5 rules of relationship according to Sigmund Freud, consciously about the unconscious:

1. Why don't we fall in love every month with someone new? Because when parting, we would have to lose a piece of our own heart.

2. We do not choose each other by chance. We only meet those who already exist in our subconscious.

3. We are never as defenseless as when we love and never as hopelessly unhappy as when we lose the object of love or his love.

4. Bold and self-confident is the one who gains the conviction that he is loved.

5. Each person has desires that he does not communicate to others, and desires in which he does not even admit to himself.

How often in life, making mistakes, we lose those whom we value ... Trying to please strangers, sometimes we run away from our neighbors ... We exalt those who are not worthy of us, but we betray the most faithful ... Who loves us so much, we offend, and the apologies themselves we wait.

You need to have something in common in order to understand each other, and be different in order to love each other.

how often in life, making mistakes, we lose those whom we value ...
Trying to please strangers, sometimes we run away from our neighbor ...
We exalt those who are not worthy of us, but we betray the most faithful ...
Who loves us so much, we offend, and we ourselves are waiting for an apology ...

How often in life, making mistakes, we lose those whom we value ... Trying to please strangers, sometimes we run away from our neighbors ... We exalt those who are not worthy of us, but we betray the most faithful ... Who loves us so much, we offend, and we ourselves expect apologies ...

Do not quarrel over trifles, do not be offended by stupidity, we all
have the right to do
mistakes, appreciate the one who is next to you and gives
a reason to smile and live. (from)

You need to have something in common to understand each other,
and be different in order to love each other ... (c)

We seek, we meet, we find, we lose
Having - we do not appreciate ... meeting - we throw ...
Attempt and torture. Got together - scattered ...
They did not have time to live and parted again.
But where is love, so that forever and without an edge ...
Or maybe this one, maybe another ...
Faces, bodies and smiles change
But the search only multiplies the errors.
Falling in love, affection, passion - whatever,
We play with ourselves and others freely,
When is love - it's not difficult to guess -
When it's no longer possible without each other ...

(The story is based on a real story ...)

Often making mistakes, we do not even think that we will have to pay a very dear price for each step? The price of reckoning is different for everyone and, accordingly, the consequences that completely change our lives.
I made a mistake. Fell in love. Love, but what a mistake, many will say, this is a miracle. Yes, one cannot argue with this, love is a gift from God. But the problem is, I fell in love with my brother's girlfriend. This is no exception and a frequent occurrence in the modern world. From that moment on, my life abruptly changed direction, I left the righteous path, betrayed everyone, my brother, my love, and even myself. We can say that fate laughed at me, unable to withstand its blows, I broke down, fell so low, for which I now pay. The punishment is much more terrible when you realize all the bitterness of sadness and loss, the consequences of your mistake. I was left alone, alone with my torment. It hurts me. It is a pity that the time cannot be turned back and changed the past, not to replay fate, you just need to come to terms.

My brother himself introduced me to Anya. I will never forget the day when she first entered my life. I did not realize that I fell in love with her, because we communicated as friends. I became her best friend, that's how she talked about me. We spent time together, walked, had fun, talked for hours on the phone, I knew almost everything about her. Anya easily shared her secrets, cried on my shoulder from the insults of Ruslan, my brother. I was a “vest” for her - a person who is always there no matter what. It became a must, even necessary for her, and most likely for me. So I could be with her, because at that moment she needed me, it impressed me. I did not notice how my feelings became stronger every day. At first, I drove such thoughts away from myself, laughed at this stupidity. At the sight of her, my heart suddenly pounded madly, even at a distance she was reflected in my eyes. When we all got together, a strange feeling took possession of me, dislike, pain, jealousy for my brother. I was overwhelmed with anger, I was indignant at myself, at the hopelessness and hopelessness of the current situation.
Ruslan continued to lead his usual lifestyle, at the same time meeting beautiful girls, while not letting go of Anya, he constantly deceived her and forced me to cover up my adventures. Sometimes my hands were so itchy to move him, but I could not, I confess - a coward, I could not raise my hand to him, he is my brother, and even beloved Ani, how could I look after that into her eyes. I could not refuse, I could not stop him, I just looked and was silent ...
Unexpectedly for me, Ruslan offers a game, fun entertainment, as he said, to conclude a kind of tacit agreement, a kind of deal with conscience. I needed to save him from a new obsessive passion, which he was rather fed up with, stir up with it, and then how it goes ...
The offer is so low that only a bastard will agree, realizing this, I agreed ... Then I did not think about anything but Anya. If I agree, then he will fulfill any of my wishes, rather a condition. And my only desire is Ani's happiness. Ruslan should be with her and in no way upset her. If I refuse, then he immediately dumps Anya. I couldn't let this happen. What can you do. She is madly in love with him, Ruslan is her life.
Everything would be fine, just a new twist, Katya fell in love with me, and confused all the cards. Anya did not really like my relationship with Katya, she also knew about Ruslan's former relationship with Katya and wondered how I could go down like that. Now I am for her the same scoundrel as everyone else ...
The situation is out of control. Events took an unexpected turn. Our relationship got so tangled, everyone became jealous of each other. I was jealous of Anya, she of me for Katya, while she was jealous of Ruslan for Katya, Katya for me for Anya, Ruslan for her for me. Straight Brazilian TV series of some kind. It's funny, but not for us. Anya constantly cries, Ruslan does not pay attention to her, is cold to her. I lie to Katya about my feelings and thereby make her suffer. Ruslan begins to rage that Katya no longer communicates with him, since earlier, hurt by male pride, he starts a relationship with Marina, the girl of our mutual friend. And then it started, I cover him, deceive Katya and Anya. I never thought I was capable of such a thing. I would be in the theatrical, how sophisticated I dodged and lied. Spyana almost slept with Marina, angry with Anya and Katya, completely lost his head, but stopped in time. All this lasted six months. Six months of lies and pretense ... and finally betrayal ...
How complicated it is. I have no strength, and my conscience tortured me, so there is still something human left in me. Enough for me, sinking too deep in the swamp. Without hesitation, I told almost everything to Anya, about the contract, about Katya, that I never loved her, broke up with her, that I love only her, and did everything for her sake.
Better to never open my mouth. Anything that is forbidden should never see the light. But nothing could stop me ...
Our relations have grown cold, there is no longer the former openness, but what I wanted, it is my own fault. Ruslan announced that he did not want to communicate with me anymore. This is understandable, I betrayed our friendship and brotherhood. Everyone had a fight to smithereens, and it was all my fault. Found a scapegoat. Friendship, love came to an end, our relationship did not stand the test ...

I am not trying to justify myself, I fully admit my guilt, I hope that someday I will deserve forgiveness from those to whom I have caused so much pain and hurt. I want to say one thing, love cannot be turned into a game, you will still lose. This feeling must be carried with an open heart and soul; one must love without selfishness.
I still love Anya, knowing that she has a different life, not connected either with me or with my brother, but with a worthy honest person. Let her be the happiest.
After what happened, I realized that loving does not mean having ...
I have nothing, only memory and my boundless devotion have become. How sad it sounds - unlimited. Without! Without! Almost reckless ...

Hello! I lost everything, my husband, my son, my job because of my stupidity. My husband did not forgive me, my treason, took my son. I tried to hang myself, but it didn’t work, I want to commit suicide, I don’t want to live without my son, my beloved husband. I realized all my mistakes, I begged my husband on my knees, he doesn't want to listen to me. My life is quietly dying out. I see no purpose and meaning in life. I am all filled with fear, so I can't leave this life. I know those who did it and I envy them, they lie and nothing worries them!
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Fallen, age: 40 / 10/19/2014

Feedback:

Hello!
Please do not take any rash steps now, especially those that cannot be corrected later. It is better first of all to calm down and try to look at everything that happened a little differently. Yes, you, apparently, made a very serious mistake, but who of us is not mistaken? Are there people who always do everything right, always do the right thing? There is no such.
The good thing is that you realized your mistake, sincerely repent of it, and God will certainly forgive and forgive your sin, provided that you do good deeds for others. Because human sins are enormous, but even more is God's love for us, no repentant sin will shield us from this love. Let's hope in Him!
Moreover, you have a huge "field of activity" for good deeds - this is your son. You can do so many good, necessary, kind, useful things for him! Believe me, in this sense, you have everything ahead of you, you have very, very many opportunities to help him, love him and support him. Calm down a little, get a job, maybe not as prestigious as before, but, most importantly, stable, allowing you to earn money for yourself and to help your son. And everything will definitely improve, you'll see.
No one under any circumstances can forbid you to meet with your child, you are not deprived of parental rights. Therefore, it is better to try, perhaps once again asking forgiveness from your husband, to agree on your joint communication with your son in new life circumstances. After all, your husband, too, as a reasonable person, even if he does not forgive you, must understand that with approximately equal incomes and conditions, if suddenly the case comes to court, then the court much more often leaves the child with the mother, so it makes no sense for your husband to run into this issue. Therefore, now it is better to choose a calm, peaceful dialogue with your husband, but if suddenly it does not work out, be ready to turn to the social protection authorities and the court. But let's hope with you that it won't come to that.
In general, do not despair, please, you are not alone, you are great for writing here. Now many of those who have read your story will be mentally and in their prayers with you, and together we will definitely cope! God help you, your son and husband, let everything get better!

Vladimir, age: 28 / 19.10.2014

Well, mother, you give! she doesn't want her son! And how will your son live without you? At the first failure in life, will he want to repeat mom's experience?
Sweetheart, drive these bad thoughts with rage! Realized my mistake, you say? So, if you realized, then live and try to make fewer mistakes! Life is unpredictable, who knows what will happen with your husband, with you, with your son next? And the child needs BOTH parents, even if they are not near, but they are! They pray for their son, think about him, take care at least financially, congratulate him on his birthday, on his name day, and on the New Year. Here is who, besides you, will congratulate him with motherly kind words, who will bless? Set yourself a goal for the near future: to survive for the sake of your son! This will be the highest manifestation of maternal love! God help, dear!

Elena, age: 57 / 19.10.2014

Hello.
A husband cannot deprive you of your son, by law you are his mother and have all the corresponding rights. You need to live for him, because mom is the most precious thing a person has. Right now, you have the most difficult days, set a goal to live this day, then the next, and over time it will become easier for you. Do not withdraw into yourself while looking for work, equip your life. Take it all as punishment for your mistake. God is righteous and does not punish twice for one sin. Rather, go to church for confession, repent before God and He may soften the heart of your spouse and he will be able to forgive you. Do not despair, do not add to all your sins the betrayal of your son. Everything will work out for you, everything will be fine!

Alexander, age: 20 / 19.10.2014

Everything can be returned! do not lose hope. Everything can definitely be returned, if you were alive.
The husband will calm down over time and change his mind, the relationship with his son will improve, you will find a job. Drive away thoughts of suicide - they are from Satan!
Drink soothing herbs, get enough sleep, watch soulful and kind films - arrange for yourself such therapy. See your doctor, let him prescribe medications that you will take.
Take up sports like aikido or judo, and you won't humiliate yourself in front of anyone else. I am sure that you are a strong woman and you will succeed.

Margarita, age: 10/29/2014

Thank you very much for your response! I will try to hold on, albeit very difficult. I go to church, I pray. It's just that my little son is still small, he's only 9. I can't imagine how he will survive the separation from me. Father promises to bring him every weekend. Lord, what have I done! We live in a small village, people gossip, it's unbearable !!!
I would be glad if someone else responds.

Fallen, age: 40 / 10/26/2014

One girl married successfully. And if you want a guy that married her, what flaw to find, but it won't work. And you are good-looking, and easy-tempered, and not even a parasite. Even my mother was of her own, and she insisted - take care, they say, of your husband. You, consider, in the lottery hit the jackpot, very few people like that. We have already lived for a year. But one gnaws at the girl. Husbands keep calling to girlfriends at work, but they do all kinds of interrogations. They control, in general.

And if a corporate party is planned, they complain to each other about how difficult it was to beg her husband to let him go to the event. And she is as restless as she is. At work, he even stays late if, so the spouse will never call him. And about corporate holidays - just a question from him - whether to meet her, they say, or she herself will get by taxi.

The lack of jealousy on his part offended her, in general. Rather, it did not offend, but strongly infuriated. On his friend's birthday they somehow got out. So that friend, right in front of her husband, showered her with compliments. She whispered to him - you are not jealous or something, they say. And he is like that to her - I'm very proud of you. A half-male colleague once looked at her documents which to give or what. She introduced him to his husband, he shook hands with his colleague, and went to the kitchen, I won't bother you, they say. And after not a single question was asked to her. Once, over the jealousy of absence, she even made a scandal for him. With special effects, yeah. Such stormy tears.

Sobbed that, if you are not jealous, then you do not love the pier. And he wiped her eyes, put her on his knees, and said that I trust you, they say, just a fool. And that, in his opinion, nothing good happens from family life without trust.

That let her girlfriends complain and ask what she really likes, if she is not jealous at all. And they answered that love with jealousy always go hand in hand. She was angry, angry, and then she thinks - but I will take and take revenge! You will know how not to be jealous! And she took her colleague and invited him to a cup of tea.

And she deliberately guessed so that he would appear at her place before her husband came. Tea in the living room was served and the music turned on slow. And she put on a blouse such that you bend over a little, so you can see all the charms.

Well, a colleague looked at it. And he himself did not notice how he put it on his back, kissing and fumbling under the skirt.

Then my husband returned home from work. He looked at this disgrace, but silently disappeared into the bedroom. Colleague, legs did, of course. And she walks into the bedroom with a pavoy and looks so proudly. Only a moment later where did her ambition go. My husband collects his things with concentration. And he did not even deign to look at her. She froze in the doorway, so he pushed it aside like some furniture. He put the keys on the table and was like that. Goodbye, really, he said at last. She thought he was joking. I sulked for a week. And then she called.

Hello, help me please, I don't know what to do, how to be. I hate myself for leaving the guy I love. Yes, it’s strange, but it’s true. We have not seen each other for 2 months, although we live not far from each other, in principle. I called for a walk, but he was almost always busy, the weather was cold (it was winter). I began to wind myself up that this was all, he stopped loving and all that. She began to offer him to leave. He said he didn't want to. And so it was 8 times. In the end, he agreed, with the words "Yes, let's part. We are not suitable for each other." Then I started having hysterics (I myself am calm), began to self-limp from self-hatred. When my mother saw the scars, she was trying to swear, for a place to calmly talk to me, to listen to me. I trust no one. I have no friends. I just don't have anyone to talk to about it. The only person I trusted is my boyfriend ... now an ex.
Then we began to communicate with him simply as friends. After a month or 2, he calls to him. Again these kisses and everything like that. I was just happy that he was next to me. But after he saw my scars, he somehow moved away. After "closeness" he was so cold ... Later we walked, he kissed me goodbye and that's it. We continued to communicate, but a week later I call him out for a walk, and he again has some excuses. Hysterics again. I write to him: "What do I look like a call girl? Walking with me is not a desire / laziness, but how to call me so ok". He said that I got fucked up or something and explained why he was lazy. I calmed down. After a while, I again call him for a walk, and he again has excuses. Then she called me, wrote that I really miss. He just ignored, "I didn't know what to say." In the end, I suggest that he not communicate at all. Because it seems to me that he does not want this. Answers me: "hmm .. well, okay let's not." What? Does he really care? Several days pass. Every day I cry and hate myself for ruining everything again. I write to him that I am afraid of losing him again. He replies: "You don't want to communicate with me at all. Ehh .. And what do you want now?" I asked him to give me a sham, promised to try to change (my character and behavior), to start all over again. He answer: "now I do not want anything." At this time I deleted all my photos from Instagram. I do not know whether this is connected or not. We have not seen each other for a month, I really miss. This is his "now I don't want", is it something like "give me time"? Or is that all? What should I do? We do not communicate the second day, but it feels like an eternity (because I got used to communicating with him every day). I can’t force myself to go to school, because I’m afraid to be around people. I want to cover myself with a blanket and sit in my room and not see anyone. What do i do?