What to do if you love a girl. What if the girl I love loves another. How to fall in love with a girl if she considers you a friend? I love and she doesn’t what to do

Psychologists, like no one else, know what to do if you love a girl. Of course, she needs to like and fall in love with herself. Do you think this is difficult? Nothing like this! Let's do it...

If you love a girl, act

So, there are a number of attractiveness factors that you have to use to awaken the feelings of your girlfriend to you.

Spatial proximity. We fall in love with those whom we often see nearby: at school, at work, in the yard. If you love a girl, make her see you often. You don’t have to run after her like a boy, just be always as if by chance nearby. It's like music: the more often we hear the same song on the radio, the more we like it when we listen to it again. We are very attracted to those who are next to us.
Similarity. We like people like us more. Do not believe the saying that opposites attract. A lot of research has been conducted, the results of which show that loving each other have common basic values, interests, attitudes, and intellectual abilities. If you love a girl, find common interests, topics for conversation, common activities.
Reciprocity. We like those who like us more. Compliment the girl by chance, praise her, smile. People always respond positively to such location signs. Studies have confirmed that the expression of affection for a person causes him the same reaction.
Physical attractiveness. Only in fourth place is this factor, but a beautiful appearance really has a powerful influence. Do not get hung up on your natural facial features or complexion. Just take care of yourself, dress beautifully, make a modern haircut, be clean and tidy, make sure that you always smell good and your hair is clean. Take an interest in stylish things; girls like it.
Love yourself. Remember a very important rule, until you love yourself, no one else will love you! Love yourself, take care of yourself, find positive moments in your appearance, in character, in your activity and start to be proud of it. Be confident to interest a girl.

So what to do if you love a girl? Consider all these factors of attractiveness, and also do not miss the moment, your chance. No need to wait for the weather by the sea. As soon as you understand that the girl is just positive towards you, without negativity, start taking the bull by the horns, look after her. Give her a flower, write a note, flirt while chatting on the same social networks. If you notice that she immediately answers you messages, slow down a little and wait 7-10 minutes before writing her an answer. Why is it important not to miss the moment? Because while you are inactive, another guy may start to look after her first and.

What to do if you love a girl, but you do not communicate? Just for no reason to start looking after her is dangerous. You need to feel the atmosphere. How to do this, you already know from the factors of attractiveness. But another very useful thing is friendship with a girl! Oh, how often girls fall in love with their friends of the opposite sex. Use this technique, become her a very good friend without a hint of love. Share your difficulties with her (girls love to help, solve problems), be always, always near, become a best friend. Just don’t delay, after a couple of weeks of such close communication you can gradually begin to flirt, show your feelings. If you wait a moment, you will forever turn into the status of "just a friend."

Every person wants love. We are all born in love, grow with love and go out into the adult world in search of true and pure love. However, one problem arises here: often people fall in love with those who do not love them in return, or it is simply impossible to find a person who would like to fall in love with. Consider this scenario when a girl considers a guy a friend. How to fall in love with her?

Boys and girls can still be friends, although many do not believe in friendship between a man and a woman. Adolescence is still deprived of such prejudices, so the girl may want to maintain friendly relations with the guy. There are times when a girl has long been familiar with a guy, so she perceives him as a friend by inertia. They have been friends since childhood, so otherwise she does not look at him.

There are times when a girl is friends with a guy because she cannot meet him, and he is so good (that is, useful to her) that she is not ready to part with him. Friends can even be former lovers. Of course, it is unlikely that there is friendship between them, but one of them definitely intends to be friends and no more.

There are many situations when a girl can offer a guy only friendship. Really give up and do nothing? Is it possible to somehow change the situation ?.

Often a dilemma arises when guys wonder how to fall in love with girls. At some point in time, boys and girls cease to be friends, and begin to become interested in each other in an adult way. This is a natural stage of development. And when love begins, guys have a lot of questions, because girls turn out to be complex and other creatures than guys.

What is love? This is a feeling of a young man who is embraced by positive emotions in relation to a specific object. Falling in love makes a person live in illusion. He often sees not a real partner in whom he is in love, but a certain ideal image that seems to him or that his lover might be.

This happens with a guy who could already offer the girl to meet, and she can answer him only with friendship. Often, guys simply do not see the flaws and flaws of those girls in whom they are in love. All this thanks to a love feeling. That is why they are ready to pursue the objects of their love, no matter what. However, over time, love goes away:

If she was unrequited, then often the feelings just subside.
If love was mutual, then it can develop into true love.

How to fall in love with a girl? You should remain yourself, while demonstrating the following aspects of your personality:

Confidence.
Good breeding.
Elegance.
Courtesy.
Mindfulness.

The guy needs to get rid of such external manifestations of uncertainty as excitement, suspiciousness, anxiety, inconsistent phrases, lethargy.

Psychologists say that guys with low self-esteem always have problems with the opposite sex. Women do not like unsure losers. If the guy is like that, then you have to become different. To help yourself in this, you can go to trainings or use these recommendations:

Surround yourself with people who will support you.
Think positively.
Appreciate and respect yourself.
Be attentive and sympathetic to others, which causes a man to feel secure and secure.

How to fall in love with a girl if she considers you a friend?

Why does a girl consider a boyfriend a friend? This question must first be answered in order to understand what reason should be addressed. If a girl doesn’t like the guy outwardly, then he should take care of himself: go to the gym, put himself in order. If a girl considers a guy untidy and unfashionable, then he should deal with his appearance: buy fashionable clothes, maintain hygiene, do hairstyles, etc. If a girl says that the guy is not interested in her and just does not know her, then it’s necessary to find out about her hobbies, interests, desires.

Why is life cruel when it allows people to fall in love with those who do not respond with such a feeling? They love you, but you do not love. You love, but do not love you. Where's the justice? In fact, everything is natural. Nobody forces a person to love someone who does not reciprocate, just as he is not obliged to love everyone who loves him. We can say that a person makes his own choice when he begins to suffer and continue to fight for the love of a partner who no longer wants to respond with mutual warm feelings.

When it comes to love, people allude to feelings being difficult to control. It’s true, but only halfway. It’s hard to manage what you don’t understand. But if a person understands why he may not mutually love, then he will get a chance to get rid of his unrequited suffering.

Why does a man love those who do not love him? This is a habit that has been going on since childhood. Most parents rarely show love for their children. In single-parent families, there is no one of the parents, that is, children do not receive love from him. In other families, parents are so busy with their work and concerns that they do not devote time to their children. In third families, parents are indifferent to their own children: they hire a nanny to educate them. In the fourth, moms and dads are just so passionate about their lives that children grow on their own.

If in childhood a person grew up among parents who did not show love for their child, then he learns to love those who do not love him. Thus, parents themselves teach the child to love those who do not reciprocate. This is sometimes called "understanding what love is." In this article we will call it just a habit. Since the child always unconditionally love his parents, no matter what they do, he gets used to receive exactly the love that they give. If a person loved, and his parents were indifferent to him or paid very little attention, or he was constantly compared with someone, or criticized and forced to be good in order to receive their recognition, then he gets used to this form of love in relation to himself. As an adult, a person begins to love. And it is quite natural that he falls in love precisely with those who show him the same attitude that his parents showed to him in childhood.

Thus, the form of love that your parents (or siblings whom you treasured) showed to you in childhood dictates who you will fall in love with. You will love. But the people you are interested in will show you the attitude that you are used to from childhood. You may suffer from unrequited love. But you may notice that for some reason you don’t like those people who fall in love with you. This is all because you are not used to loving those who love you. You are accustomed to loving only people who reject you. Do you understand the mechanism?

A man loves in adulthood just as it did in childhood. What attitude parents show towards a person in childhood, the partners whom he will choose will also relate to him. A person becomes accustomed to loving only those who exhibit behavior similar to parental. And if a person’s parents didn’t love, rejected, showed indifference, then he will only love people who show such an attitude. At the same time, all applicants who show sincere love will be rejected, since a person is not accustomed to love when they love him.

The same thing happens with a guy who loves a girl who considers him his friend. He loves because she is friends with him, otherwise he would not have loved her.

You can fall in love with a girl even if she considers you her friend. To do this, do:

Become the kind of guy she wants to see next to her, that is, change, fit herself to this image.
Do not run after the girl, be a little inaccessible. Here you can also start walking with other girls to cause jealousy in your beloved, who so far rejects you.
Be generous. If a girl asks for something, then help. If she needs your attention, then give it to her.
Be independent of the opinions of parents, friends, and other people. Girls love independent, wayward guys.

How to fall in love with an ex-girlfriend?

Often falling in love with oneself is not a girlfriend, but an ex-girlfriend. Due to inexperience and warmth of emotions, young people break up. If you want to return the love of an ex-girlfriend again, then use the following tips:

Analyze the reasons for your breakup. What was the girl unhappy with? what did she not like about the guy? What claims and reproaches were on her part? Since this guy wants to return the love of his ex, he will have to change. Those flaws that the girl could not put up with should be removed from her character and behavior. You must become what she wants to see you.
Arrange up to 3 random meetings with the former. The main emphasis here is on the friendly communication of former partners. There should not be any memories, love words, requests or supplications. You just have to chat like friends. In this case, you must show yourself in a modified form. You have become ambitious, confident, purposeful, active. The girl will be hurt by the fact that such a cool guy no longer belongs to her, and will want to return to you.
Being an interesting conversationalist and periodically pleasant to surprise. Start chatting on topics that interest the girl. Begin to do such things that the former will be pleased, but she did not expect to see them from you.

Also come to your ex for help. Give her support. She must understand that you can rely on in difficult times.

How to fall in love with a girl friend?

A rather delicate situation when you like a friend's girlfriend. Here you must first make a firm decision for yourself: either you continue to be a friend, but then you stop thinking about the girl, or you begin to conquer the girl, but you will have to forget about friendship.

If friendship is important to you, then try to minimize meeting with his girlfriend. Carry yourself with other girls or with some business, hobbies, concerns.

If you still understand that a girl is important to you, then start caring for her. Always be in her sight. Come to her aid in difficult times. Fall in love with her when she is in a quarrel with your friend.

Total

Falling in love with a girl is quite possible. It remains only to decide whether you really need it. After all, it happens that fate does not in vain create a situation of unrequited love. Maybe just remain yourself and look for the one that will love you so?

Perhaps every young man at least once in his life came across the following question: "Are my feelings mutual?" Of course, you can ask the girl directly. But what if there are too many doubts, but you don’t feel like stupid?

In this case, the girl’s unconscious actions come to the rescue, which she herself may not notice. But knowing about their existence and knowing how to read them, you can easily determine whether you really have a chance of reciprocity.

Signs that she loves you

All unconscious human actions can be divided into 3 groups: behavior, look, gestures. We will analyze each one individually.

Behavior

In order to find out whether a girl is in love, it is necessary to observe how she behaves. Here are the main signs:

Interest. A girl who is not indifferent, usually with great pleasure listen to your affairs. A sure sign is that if a girl tries to ask someone else about you, she is interested in mutual acquaintances about your condition. If a girl is always ready to help you, regardless of her own affairs, then most likely she likes you.
Communication. The girl to whom you are pretty will seek communication with you. She would prefer a conversation with you, a conversation with a friend.
Pay attention: if a girl at all general meetings keeps close to you and tries to speak - this is a sure sign.
Self-sacrifice. You know that she is terribly afraid of drowning, but she boldly crawls into the boat after you? She definitely likes you.
A girl in love very often puts the interests of a guy in the foreground, forgetting about her for a while. But remember that the girl will expect the same from you, do not disappoint her.
Gifts. A gift for no reason is a reason to think about the nature of your relationship. This is the most obvious way for a girl to convey what a young man she likes. If you have been presented with a handmade thing, in which a lot of time and effort has been invested, this can become an aid to a long, serious relationship.
Jealousy. Caught a look of displeasure at himself when he spoke to her friend? Helped a lovely stranger on the street, and then you can’t understand what made her so upset? She’s just jealous of you. Even if you are not already in a relationship, a girl in love does not want to share you with others.
Care. If you get sick, and she resorts to you much more often than all other friends, if she seeks to take care of your condition, she definitely likes you. All girls have a maternal instinct that makes them care about people. But only about special people dear to the heart.
Happiness. There is one more, perhaps, the most not obvious sign. But it is also worth paying attention to: a girl in love (even if still unrequited) looks like a little sun. She rejoices in any little things, and nothing seems to upset her.

Sight

You are capable catch her eye on yourselfwhen are you in a big company? See how often this happens. If at least three or four times for your meeting - you are definitely interesting to the girl, she wants to look at you.
If you look at you pupils of a woman in love increase, then this is a true physiological sign. But please, do not try to consider the changes in girls with dark eyes. Even if you succeed, you risk embarrassing or scaring the chosen one.
You looked at the girl and saw her looked sharply the other way? This means that she is in love with you and is embarrassed by this. She wants to look at you, wants to meet with you, but she is afraid that you will not reciprocate her.

Sign language

Touch. A girl in love will constantly look for touches on the object of feelings, often even unconsciously for herself. She will sit closer to you in a cafe, in all the attractions, in the cinema and in other places. What for? In the hope that at some point your hands will meet.
If the girl is constantly trying to straighten your hair, slap on the shoulder or remove an invisible speck of dust from you, you can safely confess her feelings - and you will surely get reciprocity.
Excitement. For any woman, meeting with objects of sighing is a very exciting event. Looking at her at this moment, you can easily understand whether she is feeling for you.
A girl in love may have a slight blush on her cheeks and rapid breathing; she will not know where to put her hands and may even answer out of place. In order to notice these subtle, almost invisible signs, you need to develop good observation in yourself.
Flirt. Girls are big coquettes. And it is not surprising that the girl in love with you will flirt with you. Flirting is a surefire way to determine sympathy, to "probe the soil." And how to understand that a girl is flirting? A sure sign of flirting is compliments. They can be either direct or veiled “woven” into the conversation.
Often, flirting girl teases, teases you. Do not be offended - this is a sign that she likes you. Of course, provided that the girl does this not often and only on those topics that you yourself make fun of.

No less important sign of flirting are gestures and movements. If a girl in a conversation "shoots" her eyes, twists her curls and smiles sweetly - be sure she likes you and she flirts with you.
Rapport. One more sign - the girl unconsciously “mirrors” your poses. She can keep up with you, sit in a cafe in the same position, hold her hands in the same way - all this will be a sign of sympathy.
Personal space. If a girl is calm about your intrusions into her personal space, this will also be a sign of her sympathy for you.
What is privacy invasion? This is if you, without her permission, touch her hair or cheek, if you suddenly bite off a piece of her ice cream, or you remove a ringing phone from her purse to give to her. Did the girl suffer all this? She really likes you very much.

Signs of indifference by a woman

Here are a few basic signs that indicate that the girl does not love you:

If a girl doesn’t call you to communicate, but only in cases when she needs something, it may be familiar - she just uses you.
But feel the difference. If you chatted with the girl for an hour, and during a conversation about books, she asked you to nail a bookshelf, then she’s probably just looking for a meeting. And if she, having called, started the conversation with the words “repair”, “borrow” or “buy”, then you are completely indifferent to her.
Girl telling you about your relationship with guys? So you are only a friend to her, and she is in love with another. If she liked you, she (even meeting with someone else) would not once again remind about this.
If you have already met, but the relationship has already deteriorated, and you decided to break it, look at the reaction of the girl. If she is sincerely upset, then she still has feelings for you and everything can be restored. If she doesn't care, then the relationship has become obsolete, and you did the right thing that you decided to break it.
But if, under the threat of separation, the girl suddenly begins to show such an interest in you that has never been before, this is an occasion to think - maybe she just uses you and does not want to lose the source of money or help?

In this video, you can see through examples how the girl in love behaves:

Now you have all the necessary information. You just need to carefully look at the girl. She will certainly betray herself by word, gesture or deed.

You never thought this could happen to you. You always liked guys, and only friendship could exist between you and other girls. But suddenly you realize that you have seriously fallen in love with a girl. Who is she? Maybe your close friend, colleague or classmate, fitness trainer or even just a casual acquaintance. If you read this article, then most likely your feelings scare you, you are afraid to take the first step and be rejected, or maybe even ready to admit that you are abnormal and sick. We hope that we will be able to help you a little.

I fell in love with a girl, I want her. This is normal?

If you have never had a relationship with people of your gender and you didn’t even imagine that you were capable of feeling feelings for other girls, then, of course, it’s not easy for you now. But you must understand and accept the fact that you are absolutely fine. In the world of sex drives and addictions, there is no concept of the norm: someone likes only young people, and someone likes the elderly; someone prefers people with a Caucasian appearance, and someone - Asians; someone chooses people of the opposite sex, and someone chooses his own. You have no reason to blame yourself for falling in love with a girl.

But I always liked only the guys, - you can object. How is it that I am a girl and want another girl? This is not normal for me! And again we repeat: there is no reason for concern. Even if you usually like guys, it doesn’t mean at all that you cannot feel feelings for a girl. Perhaps you are now asking yourself the question: “If I am a girl and fell in love with a girl, then I am a lesbian?” Do not rush things and put labels on yourself. Now the most important thing for you is to sort out your feelings for this person, because this is what excites you the most.

You will have enough time to decide on your sexual orientation - if you need it at all.

In order to help researchers of human nature to more accurately determine the sexual orientation of a person, tools such as the Kinsey scale and the Klein lattice have been developed. But now it’s much more important for you to put your own feelings and thoughts in order than to look for your place on the Kinsey scale. So let's move on from theory to the answer to your question: “I fell in love with a girl, what should I do?”

What to do if you fell in love with a girl

Now that you are convinced that there is nothing strange or abnormal in your feeling, answering this question should be a little easier. But only a little: after all, falling in love almost always leads to awkwardness, embarrassment and real horror at the thought that the object of desire will know about our feelings. Needless to say about the situation when the fear of misunderstanding, rejected and even ridiculed is added to these ordinary sufferings of lovers - because, unfortunately, in our society the attitude to same-sex love still leaves much to be desired.

You could give yourself the best advice on how to behave yourself ... if you had been in the future and found out how it all ended. We don’t know all the details of your life, but still try to make out a few typical situations.

I fell in love with a girl very much and it seems to me that this is mutual

You notice that the object of your sympathy also shows signs of attention to you. But how to determine that this is exactly what you think? If the relationship between male friends is usually quite restrained, then the girls can quite afford to hug each other, smack on the cheek, make nice gifts and shower friends with compliments. Therefore, you are tormented by doubts: does she really reciprocate with you, or do you take the usual manifestations of friendship as reciprocal love?

No matter how hard it is to admit your feelings, it would be better if you do it now and do not let them corrode you from the inside.

If the girl you like really has reciprocal feelings for you, then you may well understand how difficult it is for her now. Clarifying the situation will be the best solution for both of you. But what if you were mistaken and your recognition would ruin your friendship?

One would like to say: if you are dear to someone, this person will never push you away just because you fell in love with him or her. But, alas, different things happen in life, and you yourself, perhaps, would have behaved inappropriately in the place of the girl you are in love with. Therefore, try to honestly assess your condition today. Does communication with this girl give you only positive emotions - or has friendship turned into endless suffering because you constantly think that you are not destined to be together? If your love makes you unhappy, then it’s wiser to discuss the situation with the girl you like. There is always a risk of destroying friendships, but if you continue to suppress your feelings, one day your communication may become completely unbearable for you.

Help, I fell in love with a girl and I'm afraid that she will find out about it

Everything becomes much harder if you are sure that there can be no question of any reciprocity. For example, the object of your sympathy has a young man, she is married, or did you hear how she unflatteringly spoke about same-sex relationships. In addition, the situation in your city or in the team to which you both belong can serve as an additional demotivator.

It is very bad that you have to hide your feelings, but if it comes to personal safety and emotional comfort, perhaps your decision not to demonstrate your affection is completely justified.

Nevertheless, if you fell in love with a girl unrequitedly, then trying to strangle, suppress these feelings in yourself is not necessary. This will only provoke a deterioration in your emotional, and possibly physical condition. Very soon, we will write a separate article on how to deal with unrequited feelings. Perhaps she will help you survive this difficult period for you.

If your feelings do not bring you suffering, if the presence of your girlfriend inspires, inspires you, then perhaps the problem is actually not as serious as it seems. But if you feel that it is difficult for you to endure your meetings, if you feel dependent and unhappy, then you should talk about it with a loved one or a psychologist.

I fell in love with a girl, but I live with a guy

What if you have a boyfriend, you have a strong, long relationship ... but you fell in love with a girl? The most obvious answer to this question, of course, is to prioritize. Even in the happiest relationship, it is difficult to avoid the temptations in the form of handsome guys, but with a girl a completely different case: this is not an ordinary betrayal, it is something completely new. In addition, it seems to many that going to the left with a person of your gender is not treason at all. But this is not so. Answer your question only honestly: what really makes you happy? Relationship with the guy you love, or desire to experiment? Most likely the first. But each situation is unique and we don’t know if you are really happy with your boyfriend.

If your relationship can hardly be called healthy, you often quarrel, it’s hard to find a common language, or maybe it gives you unequivocal reasons for jealousy - it’s better to stop such a relationship.

Your love is a signal: you are tired of this relationship, you need someone else. The man who will understand you; a person with whom it is good and easy. And there is nothing wrong or strange in that it will be a girl.

By the way, the above applies to the situation when a married woman fell in love with a girl. Yes, although it’s hard to admit, family relationships sometimes make us miserable, weary and eventually become an unbearable burden. And in this case, sympathy for the girl may be an indicator that your family is not all right and, possibly, for a long time.

The girl fell in love with the girl. How to be

We hope that our article has helped you understand your feelings, has led to the right questions and thoughts. As a conclusion, let's collect everything that we described above into two small lists. So, what should not be done if you fell in love with a girl:

In no case do not blame yourself. Your feelings are absolutely normal and everything is fine with you!
Take your time to label yourself and question your sexual orientation. You will have enough time to deal with this later.
Whatever decision you make, you do not need to focus on the opinions of others. Even if you know that your environment will not accept the girl’s love for the girl, this is not a reason to abandon her.
Do not try to drown or suppress your feelings. By doing this you will only harm yourself.
You should not seek advice on women's forums or services like Mail.ru Answers. An audience of such resources is unlikely to be able to give you effective advice.

And finally, a short list of what to do if you are a girl and you like a girl:

Talk frankly with the object of your sympathy - this is the only right step if you are really serious and want a relationship with this girl. No matter how terrible the rejection is, the only way you can find out is whether you should count on reciprocity.
Ask for advice from someone close to you who will understand and support you.
Let your feelings inspire you for creativity and new achievements. If falling in love brings you only negativity and suffering, it is better to consult a psychologist.
Always ask yourself one question: what makes you happy? And do as you yourself think is right.