Every mother, without exception, faces the problem of her child’s reluctance to study. Mothers begin to complain and say that only she could have a child who doesn’t care about knowledge. In fact, this opinion is fundamentally wrong: reluctance to learn arises in absolutely every child, only in each one at one time.
Experts in the field of child and developmental psychology answered us why this happens: it is difficult for a child to get used to the idea that he is a student, that he needs to learn, and also that he is responsible for acquiring knowledge. After all, studying is a kind of work, and it is very difficult for a carefree child to get himself into a working mood. So nervous shocks occur in children, only they are expressed in the form of protest and refusal to study.
This problem is most acute among children who were not prepared for school not only mentally, but also psychologically. Such children most acutely perceive a change of environment and a complete change in the rhythm of life. And even if in primary classes the child passed with pleasure and without problems; he will develop a reluctance to study in high school, which will further aggravate the situation.
As you know, it is easier to prevent a problem than to waste time, effort and nerves on solving it. The same applies to your child’s education; even if your child has not yet rebelled against studying, he will definitely do so - such is the psychological nature of children. So you can start preparing for this problem today.
The first way to instill in your child a love of learning
The first thing you need to do is to transform learning into a habit, since habit largely shapes a person’s character and interests. Drawing, writing the first letters, learning colors, shapes and figures should become a habit and be perceived as the same necessary thing as eating and watching cartoons.
Literally from kindergarten The child should get into the habit of devoting at least half an hour to studying. For him, classes should be an obligatory and unobtrusive pastime, and not hard and partly incomprehensible work that does not bring any pleasure. If your child's activities become a habit, it will be much easier for him to adapt to school, and he will not deny studying, since he has been accustomed to it for a long time.
Second way
Another way that a mother should not forget about is play.
With the help of the game, you can instill in your child a love of learning once and for all.
While playing, children do not notice how they are learning, and time flies very quickly, therefore, they do not have time to get tired of reading or writing. In the game, kids learn a lot of new and interesting things, and it is not something difficult and boring for them. In addition, the production of children's educational toys does not stand still, and today you can buy a talking alphabet, a children's computer, and everything that can help instill in a child a love of learning.
The main thing is that you cannot force your child to study. By forcing your child to study, you will completely discourage him from learning anything.
On the contrary, your task is to stimulate in him the desire to learn on his own. He should want to take a piece of paper and a pen and write the word “mom”, and not do it “under pressure”.
Third way
Motivate your child to study, and he will immediately understand that he can achieve much more with good studying and excellent grades than if he refuses to do homework.
For example, I got an excellent grade - I went to the theater, the circus, or took a long walk on the street. Did your homework on time and got paid for it new toy. Of course, you will worry that your child will study only because of some gifts and toys, however, you should not worry about this: studying well will become a habit for him. And you, in turn, when things get better and the child does not deny learning, you should take his efforts and diligent behavior for granted, citing the fact that everyone good child must study well to become famous football player, for example, either a scientist or a president.
Plus, if you want your treasure to really love learning, don’t forget to praise him everywhere and always. Praise is a great learning motivator. The baby will see that he is doing everything right, and what he is doing gives great pleasure to his parents.
It is important to remember that every child is born to learn. Think about how many new skills a child learns in the first two years of life: getting his own needs met from adults, walking, talking, smiling, frowning, sleeping at night and playing during the day, eating on his own, exchanging toys with peers.
By the age of 4-5 years, most children know colors and numbers, can ride a tricycle, and handle complex toys and difficult people. If two or more languages are spoken in the parental home, a child under 10 years of age is capable of becoming a native speaker of all of these languages.
For a child, every day of life is filled with a huge amount of new information and new opportunities to learn. When he is not isolated or emotionally or physically abused, his every day is filled with learning. Every day he feels satisfaction from new victories.
It is enough to look at a small child, determined to succeed in the business he has started, to learn not to give up. Parents do not need to instill in their child a love of learning, because it is inherent in him by nature. The main task of parents is to preserve this love.
1. Learn by yourself
As with many things, children learn the love of learning at home from the example of their parents. If a parent enjoys learning new things, if they enjoy solving challenging problems, if they strive to hone their skills to the point of mastery, the child will follow suit. The desire to expand your own knowledge and the ability to leave your comfort zone is contagious.
Maintain your enthusiasm and love of learning. Share stories with your child about how you achieved something that was not at all easy. Show your child that this or that task requires a lot of strength and patience, but once you have completed it, you feel satisfaction from achieving the goal.
2.Share your curiosity with your child
Children are naturally very curious. Support this quality in your child with your own curiosity. Ask out loud a question about how a particular mechanism works. Take your children's questions seriously. Look for answers on the Internet or in books. Watch science and nature programs together and discuss what you learn from them. Do simple experiments at home.
On the Internet you can find a huge number of fun experiments that are easy to do at home, ranging from a mini-model of a volcano to learning chemistry through cooking. An hour or two of time devoted research work on weekends, will support the child's love of knowledge.
3.Read and read again
Academic success in school largely depends on how well a child develops reading skills and interest in reading. Read aloud to children. Invite your child to read in turns - one page - you, and the other - he. Choose books that are “dragging”, so the child will be interested in finding out what will happen in the next chapter. Go to the library and bookstores with your child. As soon as he learns to read himself, a whole literary world will open up to him, full of knowledge and entertainment. Children who love to read will not feel uncomfortable when they are given a lengthy reading assignment at school.
4.Write and write again
It is interesting that teachers and psychologists often advise reading as much as possible, but there is not so much advice on learning to write. However, writing skill is key to success in school. Many parents are happy when their child learns to write his name, but you shouldn’t stop there for long, it’s important to continue developing your writing skill. And it starts with collaboration.
Ask your child to describe the picture and record his story. Together, find letters familiar to your child. Keep a joint diary in which you will write down all the good things that happened to you during the day. This way the child will learn to express his thoughts. As soon as he can write individual words, invite him not only to dictate to you, but also to write himself. Such a journal will not only develop useful writing skills, but will also become a real family treasure years later.
5. Be interested in what is happening at school
Children are able to read their parents' emotions. And if the parent is truly interested school life your child, this interest will be passed on to him. Ask what new things your child learned at school. Take an interest in his affairs, but do not criticize him.
Review the tests and tests together and analyze the results. Pay attention to how your child feels about doing homework. Ask him open questions, suggesting a detailed answer, and not just yes/no. Keep up to date with your child's grades and ask teachers about their progress.
6.Create a study area
It doesn't matter whether the child does his homework at the kitchen table or at his own desk. It is important that space and time should be allocated for studying, and everything you need should be at hand. If a parent sets aside a place and set a time for homework, he shows the child that his work is taken seriously.
Reduce distractions, such as the TV on or the phone ringing. Periodically ask how your child is coping with the task. There is no need to constantly sit with him and monitor every letter; it will be enough for him to know that you will come to the rescue if necessary. Don't forget to enjoy your child's success; positive reinforcement from parents is very important for him.
Original: Marie Hartwell-Walker - 6 Ways to Keep Your Kids Excited about School
Translation: Eliseeva Margarita Igorevna
The moment when a child gives his parents an ultimatum: “Go to your school yourself” or “I don’t want to study” occurs in almost all families. And most often, parents do not know how to properly respond to such statements and motivate their child to acquire the necessary knowledge. In an attempt to somehow influence their disobedient child, mothers and fathers sometimes try to use intimidation or force. But such methods are ineffective and can completely discourage your child from learning. So how can you awaken a child’s thirst for knowledge?
Encourage children's questions
Cultivating curiosity is a long and methodical process. Every time your child comes to you with another question, try to give a comprehensive answer to it. If the family constantly “brush off” their child and tell him “not now”, “later”, then the child loses all desire to ask and learn something new.
Provide assistance
If your baby loves biology, buy him an exciting colorful book about plants and animals. If your child loves to dance, invite him to enroll in a choreography club. Accompany him wherever he suggests going - to the zoo, museum or concert. And most importantly, be interested in his impressions and emotions about what he saw.
Tell success stories
A good technique is to discuss the biographies of great people whose names have gone down in history. At the same time, it is necessary to find out from the child whose story interested him most and focus on the fact that without curiosity, perseverance and love for his work, this person would not have reached such heights.
Shape your environment
Keep track of which peers your child interacts closely with, because they have a direct impact on his thinking and attitude towards learning. Find out what the overall performance of the class in which your child is studying is: if bad grades are considered the norm there, then the child will have no incentive to try. In this case, think about changing classes or schools. You can more gently adjust your baby's environment and place him in an environment of inquisitive and hardworking children by finding for him sports section, children's club or a club of interests.
Observe the situation
An unfavorable environment at school or at home often causes poor performance. Constant domestic quarrels, family problems, bullying by classmates, incompetence school teachers and a host of other factors will not allow your child to fully concentrate on the learning process. Try to protect him from such experiences: talk about this topic, ask how your child feels about teachers, classmates, and high school students. Attend school meetings and always stay up to date!
Take bad grades in stride
There is a reason for everything - and a bad grade too. Even excellent students cannot always receive only high scores. Try to find out what prevented the child from completing the task properly and help solve the problem. Never compare your child’s performance with the performance of his brother or sister, friends or classmates. Such comparisons cause a hidden protest, and children often begin to behave badly to spite their parents.
Control loads
If your beloved child, in addition to school, attends two more sections and three clubs, then he is unlikely to succeed everywhere. Make sure he has time to do homework and get proper rest.
Forget about threats and blackmail
Any aggressive pressure from the parent will make the child dislike the learning process and gradually withdraw into himself. Then you definitely won’t be able to help him in any way.
Interest in the cognitive process is an important quality for modern man, which helps to constantly develop and successfully compete in the labor market. Help your child become successful, happy and reach new and new heights!
Our reality is that most children are pathologically don't want to study. The thoughts of a modern schoolchild are occupied by computer games, the street, and television, but studies most often fade into the background. And only their parents understand that good grades are the key to success. adult life. How to instill in a child a desire to learn?
First, stop forcing your child to study well. The more you demand, the worse the result will be. Even if the grades are good, as soon as you loosen control, bad marks will begin to appear in the diary if the child does not like to study on his own.
You should not use various types of punishments for poor studies. Very often, as punishment, parents deprive their child of the opportunity to watch TV or limit access to the computer. These ineffective methods will only embitter the child, and he can easily make up for the deprivation by visiting his friends.
To instill in your child a desire to learn, try to do things differently, using the carrot rather than the stick principle. For example, if your child, a primary school student, gets a bad grade, do not scold him. On the contrary, you can organize a delicious farewell to the deuce from the diary, telling the child to study well, because it is no longer possible to store in the diary bad marks. The child, surprised by your non-standard reaction, will try to study well so as not to let you down in the future.
Also, to instill a desire to learn, you can use your child’s favorite pastime – computer games. Choose a variety of exercise equipment for him in the subjects that he dislikes the most. It has long been proven that when playing, a child better perceives complex information. By arousing curiosity about school subjects, you will let your child know that lessons can be interesting too.
For high school students, an incentive to do well in school can be a promise to buy him something he has been dreaming about for a long time. Sadly, money is increasingly becoming the most effective motivator in the modern world.
In order for your high school student to become a better student, do not forget to periodically remind him that his future depends on his attitude towards learning. Most teenagers dream of fashionable clothes, a cool car, a luxurious dacha and other benefits that are popularized in the media as signs of a successful life. So tell me that it is not possible to achieve this without studying. Give examples of your friends and relatives who achieved material well-being thanks to their knowledge acquired at school and college.
Instill a desire to learn in your child- the process is complex, but no matter how difficult it is, remember that not only the future of your beloved children, but, possibly, your future depends on your efforts.
Take it to the wall so you don't lose it.
Probably every parent knows how difficult it is sometimes to convince a child to do his homework, finish reading a book, or do something in which the child does not have the slightest interest. Often this happens because studying turns into a routine and obligation that children cannot stand. Or they simply don’t understand why they need to study. However, there are many ways to arouse children's interest in learning.
Please note that when speaking about interest in “study”, I do not mean only studying at school and college, I am talking about the thirst for knowledge that a person will carry throughout his entire life.
1. Don't expect too much from children.
Remember, all children are different, even within the same family, they all have their own talents, strengths and weaknesses.
2. Don't compare your children to others.
How do you feel when you are compared to someone? I want to send everyone away, don’t I?! Comparing your child with someone else will achieve nothing but demotivation, a feeling of academic rejection and powerlessness.
3. Show that learning is cool by example.
Share interesting facts, about which you will find out for yourself. Talk about your hobbies, hobbies, books you've read, interesting movies, and what you find interesting about them, whether it's sports, science, art, or cooking. Read books yourself to set an example for your children.
According to research, words convey only 7% of information, 38% conveys the tone of your voice and 55% your body language (gestures, body position, head, etc.). Therefore, talk less about the importance of studying, show more by your example.
4. Read books together. Read interesting points from your books
📌 See the list of some books I have read.
5. Use technology
Computers and gadgets, like any other tool, can be used for evil or good! You can “get rid of” a child by allowing him to often play games and watch cartoons, or you can use computers and gadgets to teach a child to sing, draw, create, design, program, fantasize, remember, study, read, etc.
For example, on YouTube you can find “How to” videos on almost any topic or hobby.
6. Surround children with books
A Harvard University study showed that constant and easy access to books significantly increases children's motivation to learn and read.
7. Don't insist on a specific place to study.
8. Encourage creativity
Let your child draw, sing, make films, record audio, make crafts, sculpt, travel, dance, cook, put together puzzles and do whatever interests him. Doing something yourself is one of the the best ways gain knowledge and instill love for it. You never know where this or that hobby will lead.
From the personal. In 8th or 9th grade, I became very interested in programming. This hobby completely absorbed me, and soon, while still in school, I began selling my programs (warehouse, accounting, human resources department, etc.). Further, this hobby fed me throughout my student years. I also owe a lot of my advancement at work to the skills I gained from this hobby. And now, more than 20 years later, these skills come in handy for me on the online project MoneyPapa!)))) So much for a childhood hobby!
9. Throw away the TV or don’t turn it on for more than 15-30 minutes a day
This is not the first time I am writing about this. Don’t be lazy, read the research; TV, to put it very mildly, does not “make” us (and our children) smart people. Even educational programs are inferior in effectiveness to most educational activities, games and books. Besides, TV eats up valuable time. In many years, your children will thank you very much for this!
10. Use children's hobbies
For example, if a child is interested in the history of ancient Greek myths, take him to the appropriate exhibition, buy books on the topic, download films on the topic on the Internet and watch them together.
A University of Chicago study of successful athletes and entertainers found one common element in their upbringing: the parents of these successful people, from childhood they helped children identify their talents, and then they tried as best they could to support and encourage these talents in their children.
11. Find the right explanations
It's easier for children to do something when they understand why! (By the way, adults too!))). If a child says, “Why should I learn this bullshit that will never be useful to me in my life?!” you can say something like “Because studying this subject practices skills that will help you throughout your life: the ability to finish unloved and routine work as quickly and efficiently as possible; persistence in overcoming difficulties; ability to find, connect and remember information; the ability to do not only favorite work, but also necessary work; ability to focus for long periods of time, etc.”
12. Play games together
There are a huge number of them, some of them for intellectual development, some for physical development, and some that successfully combine brain development and movement.
From the personal. Around 1990, 3-4 years before graduation, my parents bought me an analogue of the famous one. Bought it because... They began to notice some financial abilities in me. I fell in love with the game and started winning even against adults))) Then I got bored, and I added my own elements to the game - goods, promotions, gold. As a result, this game allowed me to understand exactly what profession I want to do in life.
13. Find role models and outside support.
Role models are not always just parents. For example, if a child sees that you have two degrees, but at the same time you live in poverty, the explanation “everyone in the family has an education and you should have it” will not work, because the child will not understand what it is for! In this case, it is important to choose an environment and examples that will inspire your child. As an example, stories of entrepreneurs are always very inspiring.
14. Don’t try to make your child do everything perfectly.
You shouldn’t control every step, every result, trying to do everything right. There is no need to say: “You did it wrong, let me show you how to fix it.” Sometimes, a child needs to be allowed to make a mistake and find a way to correct it.
15. Ask questions that spark interest
“Where do birds fly every year and how do they find their way back?”, “How long is it to fly to Mars and how much would a car weigh on the Moon” - such questions will awaken your children’s interest in knowledge. There are now thousands of books, movies, articles, and apps that parents can use to ask questions (and answers) like these.
16. Help explain and find answers
Children ask an endless number of questions. If you know the answer, always explain it and tell me how to get the answer yourself, where to find information, how to solve the problem, etc. If you don’t know the answer, that’s normal, find it together – thank God, it’s very easy to do this now with the Internet.
17. Don't reward good grades with money.
Many studies show that monetary (or other material) motivation works for a small percentage of children and lasts for a very short time. What will you do next?
18. Focus on the process, not the results.
All parents want their child to do better than other children. The measure of success is grades, tests, exams, speed, etc. But all children are different, and not everyone succeeds quickly, so success often comes much later. Therefore, it is important not to kill the child’s interest in the matter by chasing grades in the short term.
19. Help develop skills that help you learn.
Skills such as quick counting, developing logic and solving mathematical problems, the ability to focus for a long time, reading quickly, the ability to find information and connect its different parts to solve complex problems, discipline and routine will help your children do better than others not only in their favorite subjects , but also in everyone else, and further in life.
20. Break big tasks into small ones.
Agree, the phrases “You still haven’t read this book?!” and “Great, you’ve read 11 chapters, there’s only one left, the last one!” may be about the same thing, but have a completely different impact on the child.
21. Ask your child’s opinion on various issues (events, relationships, values, facts, life situations)
Don't judge him for his opinion. Let your child know that his opinion is interesting and respected, even if you disagree with him.
And lastly, don’t forget about free time
Children need more time to learn than adults. Don't overload your child's schedule, otherwise he may not have time to learn new knowledge and skills and have any fun doing it.
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