Why a relationship with an independent woman is the best choice. She doesn't need you: why are you afraid of independent women I like a strong and independent woman

If by the age of 30 a woman has not had time to have a family and children, it is generally accepted that she devoted herself to a career or study. Such women often occupy good positions, receive a decent salary and have a good social status in society. They give the impression of strong women, independent of men. Such women are independent and successful in business.



But this independence also has a downside. It is increasingly difficult for a woman after 30 to find a spouse for herself, the body, which is often exposed to stressful situations, is no longer as fresh as in her youth and the chance of having children decreases every year.

In addition, men are afraid of strong and independent women after 30, since it is almost impossible to re-educate them, their character has already developed and a man risks becoming henpecked with such an "iron lady" or living in constant confrontation with her. As a result, often successful and independent women with age remain to while away the evenings for a couple with their pets, for some reason, these are most often cats, and the TV.



At home they are greeted by one or more four-legged favorites, with them independent and proud women have to meet old age. And stupid principles or pride do not allow admitting your desire to change something. It is difficult for such women to submit to a man and accept his opinion as authoritative.



Old age is often unenviable for such women - a TV and a dozen cats. Of course, in old age they often have financial savings and housing, but, alas, there is no one to leave it all, except for the same cats.

Strong independent man.

Unlike strong and independent women, a strong and independent man by the age of 30 has nothing. He does not have a normal job, because it is beneath his dignity to work for an “uncle”. He often has no education, because “he considers it stupid to spend the best years of his youth studying.”
Well, a strong and independent man has successfully excluded himself from the army, since they are not taken to the army with his health.

An independent man most often lives with his mother, because "all women are the same, and only mother is worthy of love."
If such a man lives alone, then his wardrobe and diet are quite typical - a greasy T-shirt, leaky socks, a full refrigerator of beer and dumplings, and of course his favorite sagging sofa in front of a computer monitor.

A strong and independent man believes that no woman is worthy to have such a “treasure” like him. His interests are limited to online games, primitive low-paying jobs and alcohol.

In general, such a man treats women haughtily with condescension. This is necessary to hide the panic fear of serious relationships and the opposite sex. Women must be looked after, taken care of and loved, but a strong and independent man himself wants to be taken care of, adored and "spoon-fed."

A strong and independent man is not spoiled with homemade food and clean clothes, therefore he considers it not an obligatory surplus.

There are women we admire. They are always successful, achieve their goals, are smart, beautiful and interesting. They are loved by others, and men admire such ladies and dream of seeing them as spouses. Strong and independent - these words have long ceased to be synonymous with a lonely mature woman who lives with a dozen cats, because she could not build a relationship with a man. After all, a strong independent woman may well be happy in love, as well as alone. What qualities does this superwoman have?

She has her own opinion, and she knows how to defend it

Stereotypical reasoning that only a man should make decisions, and that the fairer sex should not have their own opinion, and in general an ideal woman is timid and obedient, has long been out of date. A lady who has her own opinion and is able to protect it no longer causes bewilderment, but rather respect. They will listen to her, communicate with her, it is pleasant and interesting to be in her company. And it is these women who are able to achieve a lot and achieve professional success.

She has her own style, but fashion trends are not alien to her.

Individual style is an important trait that every woman should have. This is what makes her unique and truly attractive. Despite this, such a woman is aware of all fashion trends, and skillfully uses them in her image. However, she will not be hung with trendy things, choosing only those that suit her and fit into her style.

She loves herself

Self-love is a very important nuance that determines how others will treat you. If you yourself do not love yourself and you are not interested in being alone, why do you hope that others will love you?

Admire yourself - you are unique and beautiful. And don't forget to pamper yourself. You deserve only the best - the best outfits, the best man, the best life.

She does not depend on someone else's opinion

This is not to say that a strong and independent woman is completely indifferent to other people's opinions. On the contrary, it seeks to make the right impression on everyone. But she perfectly understands that it is impossible to please everyone, and therefore does not get upset when it turns out that someone does not like her at all. Someone else's opinion will never make her change her mind if she is sure that she is right, and will not affect the final result of any event.

She is loyal to a man

A strong and independent woman is not one of those who tell her chosen one what he owes, and does not blackmail him with the words "you are a man." She allows her beloved to have small weaknesses, leaves him the right to independently make decisions concerning his life, and also listens to his opinion. At the same time, she does not always agree and will not act contrary to her wishes - she will try to find a compromise.

She achieves her goals

The main feature of a strong and independent woman is that her goals are not empty words, no matter what it may involve. If this woman wants something, she will act, and not complain about fate. And actions always lead to results, sooner or later. The main thing is to be purposeful and not give up.

She looks at the world positively

This is the secret of her success - she perceives the world, looking at it positively, highlighting only the best, and is not looking for something to complain about. Even her problems, regardless of their severity, she perceives only as an annoying obstacle that needs to be overcome, and not as a misfortune of a universal scale.

Are you afraid of independent women? When a man sees that his chosen one can calmly bear responsibility for herself, manage her life and support herself, then for some reason he quickly retreats. By the way, there are many advantages in a relationship with an independent woman.

● She feels great alone.

Some women panic and become helpless when they are left for a few days, say on a business trip. Independent women do a great job on their own, so you don't have to deal with countless calls and text messages from your partner who has to ask you something right now or she urgently needs your help.

● She knows what it's like to have a life of her own.

An independent woman knows how to organize her own life. She has a good job that makes her financially independent. In addition, she has hobbies and friends with whom she enjoys spending. When you're already in a relationship, she won't spend every day at home with you alone, because she has no other options. Routine? Never! An independent woman will not allow routine to creep into your relationship.

● She also wants you to have a life of your own.

An independent woman does not require you to be involved in your relationship around the clock; she does not want you to forget about your friends, your hobbies and established habits. She wants you to develop the way you want to develop yourself. She is also ready to accept all your friends, not only other men, but women as well. You won't feel like a bird in a cage in this relationship. Your own needs and your friends are also important to your independent partner.

● She is good at problem solving

An independent woman takes your advice into account and can count on your support in a difficult situation, but she is usually able to decide everything herself. She is strong enough to withstand even the most difficult challenges. She does not want to burden you and place additional burdens on your shoulders.

● She will be your equal partner

An independent woman knows what equality means in a relationship. She wants to be neither higher nor lower, nor worse, nor better. You can count on a fair distribution of responsibilities and harmony without unnecessary misunderstandings. This can prevent many conflicts and make your relationship more successful.

● She will not drag you to the registry office

And many men are afraid of this. They think that after several months of dating, the partner will insist on marriage and children, even if the man may not be ready for such a serious step. If you are afraid of such "quick action", then an independent woman is your right choice. You will not feel pressured and will not hear constant complaints that she urgently wants a family and children.

● She has a great sense of humor

A sense of humor and the ability to tell funny and decent anecdotes is what sets an independent woman apart. You don't need to be afraid that she will take jokes too seriously and take offense at your friends' dark humor, making you feel uncomfortable and embarrassed. Self-confidence and enthusiasm are the qualities that make her enjoy life.

● She does not hide her feelings

If you are dating an independent woman, you do not need to be afraid that you will not understand her notorious feminine logic. You do not need to decipher her because she is always frank and honest. She has nothing to hide, and she does not feel the need to mislead you. If you hurt her, she will voice it to you. If she doesn't like something about you, you will immediately know about it. Such communication can initially prevent many contradictions and disagreements.

● She knows how to deal with your parents and friends

You don't need to stick with her all the time when you meet your friends or relatives. She knows what to say and how to react tactfully. Even if your parents are absolute conservatives and skeptics, it will not annoy her. An independent woman just knows how to handle and communicate with a wide variety of people.

Don't wait - go for it!

Any, even the smallest, forward movement is more effective than stupid waiting. Not calling after the interview? Call yourself and find out when the decision will be made. Boyfriend can't decide on weekend plans? Plan your leisure time independently of it. Can't get promoted for a long time? Consider other companies or related jobs. It is better to try many options and not get what you want than to do nothing at all. No one will do more for you than yourself.

Don't think about how you are judged. Rate it yourself

It’s not much fun to sit on a date in a cafe and wonder “How am I to him?”. You've probably noticed that men often don't even consider the possibility that they might not like them. So relax, sit back and rate your boyfriend in all respects. At the same time, you can decide whether it is interesting to you or not.

Do not wishful thinking

Imagine how much time you can save if you don't spend it interpreting signals of male sympathy. What difference does it make how he looked and did he put his thumb in the belt of his trousers if he still hadn't called and offered to meet? An axiom, tested by generations of women, says: a man does not call for two reasons: either he does not want to, or he died. The best frame of mind is calm optimism and no mood swings due to calls or no calls.

Be able to cheer yourself up

How to become successful and independent? Do not allow yourself to become limp due to the fact that the chef scolded for being late, an elderly lady was naughty in transport, and a friend criticized the new haircut. Other people should not negatively affect your emotional state and undermine your self-esteem. To stay in shape, keep in mind a solid list of things that make you happy: a warm bath with a book, a cup of coffee with syrup, a visit to the pool or a trip to a pedicure. Compensate for failures with pleasures.

Don't step over yourself

Self-love is the first step in any relationship in your life. Don't expect others to love you more than you love yourself. The most valuable relationship in a person's life is the relationship with oneself. What matters is what you think of yourself. You can't feel emotionally comfortable in the morning if you were late in the office the night before doing someone else's work. When you don’t want to do something, politely refuse, and you will feel what it means "a mountain off your shoulders" and "lightness in your soul."

Don't compare yourself to others

Comparing your own success with the success of others often results in envy. How to become an independent girl? If you are unhappy that Lenka from the marketing department has received a promotion, and you, a procurement specialist, have not yet, think about what does not suit you in your situation. Don't you feel appreciated, don't work according to your calling, or firmly believe that high status guarantees moral satisfaction? Comparing yourself with Lenka is the same as comparing the south with the north, and the day with the night.

Develop your abilities

Harmonious personal and professional development can make you happier and positively affect your self-esteem. Regularly do what you are good at and what you really enjoy. Learn to do it really well. And sometimes it is useful to trust some method of identifying congenital tendencies. Perhaps you will not develop them, but you will probably take note of them. What you don't do in your day-to-day work can be turned into a hobby. Talent development fosters qualities that can be valuable in both your career and your personal life.

Develop missing skills

You probably know the feeling of reluctance to take on a task that requires the use of tools that you don't know well. For example, you don't like working in Excel and always delay the preparation of a report in this program. Ask a colleague to show you some of the features, and you will finish reporting faster next month.

Brian Tracy, author of books on self-development and leadership, writes about the missing skills: “You can learn virtuoso time management in the same way that you can learn anything, and here is the main hint: you may be missing just one time management skill to double your income. You may be missing just one business skill! You probably already know what this skill is ... "

Forgive your weakness

Weaknesses are like curls on fingerprints, without them it would be impossible to identify who the fingers belong to. Weaknesses make us not only imperfect, but also human, because they teach us to accept the weaknesses of others. Forgive yourself not laziness and bad habits, but some addictions and distinctive features: love of coffee, mess on the table, slowness or excessive talkativeness. Such little things, although they distance you from the ideal, work great for your corporate identity.

Be financially independent

Material independence gives you an advantage in everything. Girls who can take care of themselves are more respected, and you yourself feel much more confident with a stable income. You can be a real mistress of your life only if you don't ask for anything from anyone and don't expect anything from anyone. An independent girl can afford to spend something that someone would consider unreasonable: spa treatments, shoes to lift the mood, lunch at a restaurant, a lot of swimwear or taxi services. And also, in order to become an independent woman, it is advisable to build up your own emergency supply, saving 5-10% of your salary every month. If funds stop flowing, you will not be lost.

Be free from prejudice

Someone initially accepts for themselves the rules of life by which the majority lives. In everything, you need to listen to the advice of parents, always give way in transport, work only in your specialty, after two years of relationship you must get married, and preferably up to 25 years old, and there must be at least two children. Such attitudes are suitable for you only if you accept them for yourself. For curious neighbors who want to know when you will finally get married, it is better to answer politely but firmly: "As soon as I have such a desire, I will immediately inform you about it."

Text: Marina Lysenko and Angelica Zakharina

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December 20, 2019 09:59

By Fabiosa

Men are different. While some are very decent by nature, others like to beat around the bush. Women, especially when they are in love, love with their ears, so it is very easy for us to spend in the candy-bouquet period when we do not see the obvious.

Often, men hang the same noodles on our ears.

Here is a kind of cheat sheet, which male phrases you should pay close attention to so as not to be deceived.

1. "I'm only looking for a serious relationship"

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It is commendable if this is really so, but often men say this for a catchphrase, in order to quickly take possession of a woman. At the beginning of a relationship, look more at the actions of the boyfriend. They speak louder than any word.

2. "As I saw you, I realized right away - you are the one I have been looking for all my life"

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Another phrase from the pickup lexicon. You are certainly a wonderful woman, but how did he manage to see it? It happens that people live for years and every day they learn something new about each other, and then a passing acquaintance, and already - fate? Take your time, take a closer look at him.

3. "We will always be together"

Too arrogant, reckless and hasty. How many ladies has he said that before, I wonder? Here you don't know how the day will turn out tomorrow, but he throws such serious phrases after a couple of days of dating.

4. "Before you, all women were somehow different, but you ..."

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The very fact of being compared with another woman is already ugly behavior on his part. Most likely, he is an ordinary womanizer. A smart man, even if he makes a comparison in your favor, will not voice it.

5. "I want a baby from you"

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Many women in serious relationships dream of hearing this phrase. But if you know nothing at all? Perhaps this is one of the tricks to get a woman more quickly.

How, according to your observations, men still deceive us? Let us know in the comments!

The information in this article is for informational purposes only and does not replace the advice of a certified specialist.