Natalya Kaptsova

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Cheating on one’s own husband is the most common reason why our conscientious women turn to psychologists. In one case, betrayal is a one-time misunderstanding, in the other - a love triangle (there are many options for the development of events), but regardless of the situation, the woman faces the question - what to do next?

Is it worth it to drop your spouse at your feet and beg forgiveness, or in the name of a family to pretend that nothing happened?   What do psychologists say on this subject?

The main reasons for women cheating on their husband are you familiar with them?

In men, the attitude towards adultery is surprisingly simple - “ not caught - did not cheat ". And talk about cheating on his wife - almost bad manners. Well, if only as a last resort, when the holes of the family boat cannot be hidden, and there is a desire to annoy the "unscrupulous" girlfriend of life, who is not able to appreciate either the stars or the whole world thrown at her feet.

But what about the weak half of humanity? A rare woman refers to adultery “in a manly way” - that is, as a normal occurrence and under the motto “a good leftist strengthens marriage”. Usually,   women cheat for certain reasons and after experiencing hard cheating   - with remorse, emotional throwing and vows "more - for nothing!".

Why and in what cases does a wife cheat on her husband?

• Wife - the head of the family
    This situation is not uncommon in our time. And it is precisely with this role in the family that a woman’s chances for adultery greatly increase. In this case, the “terms” change places, and the wife, changing the traditional worldview, decides that the right to the forbidden fruit belongs to her in fact - “I’m the main one here, and all dissatisfied dependents can go to their mother”.
• Physical dissatisfaction within his bed
    If the sexual relations of the spouses are a “five-minute race” in honor of March 8 (or even more often, but mechanically, for show, for an interesting series or football), then the natural development of events is an involuntary search for someone who can drown this “hunger”. As a rule, relations with this “someone” become one-time (although, sometimes, they develop into a long-playing novel), and the family crumbles.
• Adultery at work
  And there are options. One colleague impudently pursues, shamelessly wrapping her in a train of a breathtaking perfume, “accidentally” touching her hand and invitingly winking at the cafeteria. Sooner or later (if there are prerequisites in the form of problems in the family), the “defense” of a woman falls, and the new client is ready for the anonymous circle “Hello, my name is Alla, I cheated on my husband”. Another option is corporate parties. Under the influence of alcohol and emotions tearing at will, women commit a lot of nonsense.
• Vacation - to walk, so walk!
    In some families, strangely enough, it is customary to relax separately. It is possible to rest from each other and have time to miss your half. And sometimes it just doesn’t come to go together for a vacation - the work holds. As a result, the wife goes with her friend and ... The sea, a warm evening, a glass of wine, hot tanned lads from another country - and the program "I'm married!" in the head goes into sleep mode.
• Extreme
    This option can be attributed to dissatisfaction in bed with her husband, but here everything is a little more complicated. Just stability in bed is not all. There are also ladies who are simply bored without the “pepper” and experiments. Extreme sex, exciting from head to toe, is random sex, sex with a boss in his office, with a colleague on the desktop, with a friend in the restaurant’s toilet, etc. Of course, not all options are available at once (this is already a very difficult case), but one of them. And remorse with the pangs of conscience usually after such a marathon does not happen. If the spouse is able to satisfy all the extreme desires of her half, then the need for treason for her simply disappears.
• "Heredity"
    There are many exceptions to this rule. But nevertheless, it is a proven fact that the girl, in front of whose eyes her mother regularly changed fans, begins to believe that such behavior is the norm. And take a walk from my husband (if you really wanted to, the cards went down and the night is so wonderful) - this is not scary. He didn’t know anything anyway.
• Age
    Again, the rule with the exception (all under one comb revenge is impossible). But young wives are still too unstable in what they generally want from life. And a divorce in the case of a small affair usually doesn’t scare them - “well, okay, it’s all behind you like you.” Adult women are more stable in relationships. They already know that one of the whales on which the family rests is trust. And the percentage of adultery in adult women is extremely low. Moreover, the “turn of fans” is shorter and shorter every year.
• Long separation
  Spouse in the army, on a business trip, spouse - sailor or trucker, etc. A woman tired of loneliness (but, of course, loyal) suddenly meets a man who “understands” her and is ready to substitute her strong “friendly” shoulder. The strong shoulder quickly transforms into a hot embrace, into which the woman falls without even thinking. Because I already forgot what it is. Of course, in the morning it will be ashamed. And before the spouse arrives, the woman will have time to exhaust herself with remorse so much that she either immediately admits, or by that time will understand that there is, in principle, nothing to talk about. Because "anyway, the husband is the best."
• Bad example
    Some women come together to embroider a cross. Others discuss global issues and “how to get a child to do homework.” The third of the meetings is a competition - who has a “brandy” handbag, more expensive than boots, a darker tan and more lovers. There are others, of course, but the third option is the most “meaningless and merciless”. “Having a lover” for some girls is almost a matter of prestige. Like a good car or dog for $ 2,000. And under the influence of such ladies, young girls also begin to think that it is normal to play around with a fool-husband (his “wallet with legs”).
• Revenge and resentment
    Powerful factor. This reason for treason is the most common. Eye for Eye, treason for treason. Naturally, there is no need to talk about maintaining the family in such a situation. Although it happens that such a mutual shake becomes for both spouses the beginning of a new stable life.
• Husband's carelessness
    Any family once has a moment of fatigue from each other or “moment of crisis”. And it depends on both - whether they survive this period without shocks or disperse, tired of throwing firewood into the family hearth. As a rule, the scenario is the same: the husband no longer speaks affectionate words, doesn’t make surprises, doesn’t kiss when he leaves for work, he has to be taken by storm in bed, etc. Tired of futile attempts to change the situation, the woman starts looking around. Read also:

Instructions for the unfaithful wife - what to do after the betrayal of her husband?

For most women treason is a serious test , out of which, without losing the “face”, is quite difficult.

But what if the “terrible” thing happened - what do the experts advise?

• Confess or not confess? Before making a choice, ask yourself: do you love your husband? Would you like to continue sailing with him in the same family boat to a happy old age? What is the reason for treason? Can you live like before, given the fact of treason? And how can the situation develop after your recognition?
• If you love your husband, if everything suits you, and cheating is a random episode (under the influence of alcohol, emotions, resentment, etc.) that you do not intend to repeat and which no one will ever know (this is important), then confess her husband is not worth it. Because recognition is usually followed by a divorce. Awareness of your guilt will certainly haunt and torment you, but you have the opportunity to atone for your guilt with all-consuming love for your spouse and save your family.
• If there is at least 0.001%, that the truth will come upif you were almost caught red-handed, even if the psychologist did not help you get rid of remorse, and the recognition breaks out of you, as soon as you look into the eyes of your husband - admit it. It is possible that the husband will understand and forgive you. Sometimes adultery even becomes an excellent occasion - to finally discuss the problems that have accumulated in the family and eliminate all misunderstandings between the spouses. Just do not tell your husband all the intimate details. And convince him that everything happened due to circumstances that did not depend on you (alcohol, eclipse, revenge for that blonde, etc.). And do not forget to add that you understand your stupidity, you do not want a divorce, and in general "there is nobody better than you."
• Understand the reasons that pushed you to treason. Maybe it's time to change something in family life? Or is there a moment of serious conversation with her husband? Or do you yourself require more from your spouse than he can give you? Or maybe love just no longer lives in your house? Your decision to be or not to depend on the clarity of understanding of the cause. That is, is it worth forgetting about adultery and returning to the husband’s own hands or is it time to tell him the truth and start a new life without him?

What if conscience robs you of sleep, and you feel that if you do not throw this stone from your soul, then it will be easier to drown with it? How to calm your conscience and erase adultery from your memory if you disastrously do not want to admit to your husband a betrayal and are afraid to lose him?

• Error handling
  Take a break from self-eating and analyze your life. If in good company you start dancing on a table with a glass or two, and you are drawn to feats, then categorically avoid such companies and alcohol in general. If you do not have enough variety in bed, open your husband "all the secrets of pleasure after 10 years of marriage." It is unlikely that he will be against it. If you have chic guys at work, and everyone’s eyes melt the centuries-old ice, then it's time to look for another job. Etc.
• Remember: time heals
    Of course, the sediment will remain, but there is no “delete" button in our memory, so relax, stop sprinkling ash on your head, accept treason as a fait accompli and live on. Anyway, nothing can be changed. If it will be really bad, go to the priest for a confession and do everything so that from now on even your desire to change does not arise.
• Take your head with more useful thoughts
    Find a hobby that helps you ignore this “shameful moment.”
• Try to ignore anything that can remind you of treason.
    Do not go to the cafe in which you were sitting with the “Adultant”, do not walk those streets and delete all data about him from the phone, notebook and computer.
• Dedicate yourself to your husband and family.
    Come back more often to the time when you just met your spouse (especially come back to him when thoughts about that random man come). Cherish the feeling of love for your husband.
• If you feel that you are just tearing apart from guilt, do not dump the truth on your husband
    Take it to the one who will listen to you, understand and bury your secret in a cup of coffee (friend, girlfriend, parents are a close person). Relief is guaranteed.

Well, a little about "prevention." As soon as you embark on the “slippery path” of the traitor, as soon as sparks of a future fire of random passion flare up inside you - immediately think about whether you are ready to sacrifice family happiness, the psyche of children and the trust of your husband   for an hour (night) of pleasure.

What do you think of female adultery? We will be grateful for your opinion!

Darkness, emptiness, melancholy, hopelessness - this is how people most often determine the situation, talking about the betrayal of a husband or wife. “I will never forgive. Treason is the end, I’ll leave right away, ”theorists of the question most often say. When it comes to practice, thoughts change. I do not seek excuses for traitors. I want to help those who had to learn about the betrayal of a partner.

Why cheating on husband and wife. Reasons for cheating

1. The most common cause common to men and women is a lack of love. The second half is busy with work, a child, friends; no time for each other, no dialogue possible, no sex   - The most common components that make up this cocktail. At this moment, a person becomes an easy victim: a cute girl will pay attention, smile, say: “You are the smartest, kind, sexy” ... Or vice versa - a man will come across who will talk about “amazing eyes, lips” and so on. In this situation, there is something to work with, you can save the family.
2. The second reason - did not walk up. There are no special justifications here, but there is a hope that you are walking up.
3. Change for new sensations: it became boring, does not pull to the husband (wife), it would be desirable otherwise. Utopian option. As a rule, the proverb “The old horse does not spoil the furrow” is remembered too late.
4. A new love flares up - there’s nothing to talk about, anything can happen.

Severe statistics say that at least once in a lifetime 70% of men and 50% of women change. Moreover, most of them regret it, do not want the betrayal to be repeated, or half of them will know about it.

Men are more likely to change because of physical attraction. But it is important to remember that both are always to blame for treason, as well as for any problem in family life. Look at yourself in the mirror, remember your conversations for the week, reflect on when was the last time sex. Do you know the date exactly? That is, it is scheduled, by mutual agreement, in the agreed positions?

Not guilty, speak? Men need sex. They did not give birth, they have everything normal with hormones, and at some point their brain descends into the organ between the legs. So, either you need to live, given this, or not look for evidence of male adultery, especially if you are not ready to find them!

Women change ears. It is so important for them to hear about their uniqueness, uniqueness, receive gifts, romantic messages from a fan. Women want to be loved. If men read this, they will say: “Yeah, they want money, and an apartment, and a car.” It's true! But practice shows that without love, more precisely, without the manifestations of this love, it is difficult for a woman. And as soon as there is a man admiring her, she can hardly resist. And sex is rather the inevitability that occurs on the initiative of the admirer.

Cheating: is it possible to save a family

In fact, it’s not a physical variant, but an emotional betrayal that is very common: correspondence with “objects” in social networks, SMS, fantasies. And you can’t say that this is a safe option. A serious feeling often grows out of him, and then it is difficult to keep the family together.

Is it worth it? Everyone decides for himself. Most are trying to save the marriage, and I must say, successfully. Couples need to find a reason, talk. We must survive the grudge and be able to go further. And after everything is clarified, discussed and put an end, it is strictly forbidden to return to this topic! If you start a conversation every day, “Of course, I'm bad, and yours is ...” - that’s all, it’s a dead end, you won’t get out of it.

The traitor should realize, draw conclusions and never repeat such actions! Otherwise - also a dead end. There is only one option - put yourself in the place of your half, imagine an avalanche of this destructive pain ... And even better - imagine these feelings before the destructive thought visits your head. Because of lust, whim, you can lose everything that is truly valuable in life.

If a wife cheats: 4 types of women

It is not customary to talk about this topic, much less publicly. After all, it is painful, difficult to understand and causes a flurry of emotional assessments from others. But we will try to understand the origins of the problem and understand why women are cheating.

Let me give an example of a letter from my reader.

“Larisa, there’s another two weeks before we chat on Skype, and I'm going crazy. Maybe you can write an article about my problem? I know they will condemn me, there will be many angry opinions, but I don’t care. I am 31 years old, I am married, we have two children, they are 8 years old and 3 years old. I went to work from the decree, fell in love with the boss, cheated. The husband found out, forgave, he doesn’t say a bad word. But I’ve been destroying myself for a year, I hate myself, I can’t live. How could i I don’t understand ... Yes, there were problems at home, but is this an excuse? Disassemble, I beg, the reasons for female adultery! Help me survive! ”

When we talk about male adultery, then we women understand everything: he is a goat, she is a victim. And when the other way around? Say this is an exception? In the meantime, in my work, I constantly encounter female betrayals. And here we can distinguish several categories:

1. Women who change regularly throughout marriage. This does not bother them and often suits her husband. They are partners and friends, but sex has not been glued for a long time, and these infidelities are committed for the sake of physical satisfaction. No long relationships, emotions or love. There are very few such stories, and such women do not come to a psychologist because of cheating, mentioning them, incidentally, in the context of another problem.
2. Treason with the goal of “knocking out a wedge with a wedge” - her husband changed, she took revenge. Relationships after this are rarely preserved.
3. Treason as a result of great love. As a rule, the family also breaks up and a new one is created, with the object of passion.
4. But most often, such wives as the author of the letter come to me. It seemed to them that they were loved, appreciated, respected, adored, but in the end they got what they deserved. Such adultery is dominated by emotional experiences, not sex. They have a lot of correspondence and there is a touch of romance. Such relationships have no prospects, they quickly get tired, but they suffer very much when it all ends!

Cheating on her husband: what's next?

According to statistics, women experience much more severe remorse after adultery than men. And they often go with this feeling of guilt to a specialist. This is truly one of the best ways to help yourself.

1. If you want to deal with it yourself, then look for and analyze the reasons! It will become easier.
2. I can’t decide for you whether to talk about cheating on your husband or not, but you can ask for forgiveness from him in thoughts and actions. So it will be easier for you.
3. If you are a believer, consult a shepherd, this often helps.
4. Be careful with confessions to friends and relatives, very often such confessions turn against you.
5. Prevention is our everything! Speak with your husband, engage in ongoing dialogue, do not be silent. Dear men, please communicate with your wives! After all, sometimes you can lose a loved one because of stupidity.
6. Be sure to relax! The lack of rest and a constant stay in the “four walls” throws you into the arms of the first who only calls.
7. Men, speak affectionate words to women. After all, they love with their ears. Even a once-a-day message with a kind word is already good!
8. Live the life of each other, share the interests of the partner, take an interest in his work. You should be united by something other than children.
9. If an “accident” happened, try to keep the relationship. This is possible if you are important and necessary to each other.
10. It is not necessary to categorically affirm that treason cannot be forgiven, that forgiving means not respecting yourself. Only very wise and strong people are capable of forgiveness. They deserve great respect!

Discussion

Divorced, there is no other option in my opinion.

On TNT television on the site Mystic Info, I found the help of a specialist in the field of magic. He returned the spouse to the family. The problem was very big. In old age, contacted a young girl. From the first time it was clear that she was with him because of the money, because his pension was large (Chernobyl). The girl got really painful! And the children talked to him, and I, and relatives - as impenetrable! They tried to talk with her, so she built a sacrifice in front of him, and because of this he left, although not to her. She doesn’t need him! He lived with his brother. This girl is all in clubs, restaurants, but age does not allow him, so it turns out, he sits at home, and she walks with his peers with his money, and what kind of person is right for him! Long describe the whole situation! We decided to take the bull by the horns! Daughter accidentally on TNT saw a mystical show and the site Mystic info. The mystic info website has many free conspiracies and rituals. I turned to a specialist, did something and dissuaded the girl from my husband, and returned him to the family! Now we try not to discuss this misunderstanding, so as not to stir up and raise a storm once again. I liked very much that MISTIK INFO is an independent magazine and experts work through the center, and not that lone mages are all charlatans .. (all the work cost me 12,000 rubles)

“But most often, such wives as the author of the letter come to me. It seemed to them that they were loved, appreciated, respected, adored, but in the end they got what they deserved.”
For what kind of merit do they receive, author ??

09/24/2017 00:47:03, Bdtyjv780

Hello, tell me how can I overcome myself and not catch on the thought that my wife is not faithful to me? Today I found out that she corresponded and called up a colleague for half a year, and sent him my sex photos, and at the same time I categorically denied the fact of treason, and said that today everything will be finished with him after our scandal. Half a year ago, I first saw their correspondence and categorically forbade communication with this person, it helped as it turned out for a couple of weeks, after which they exchanged (as I found out in detail) phones and they called back every day every half hour. Do you think our family can survive, we have two children, two girls, and then a stab in the back after seven years of marriage. I really do not want to lose her, but the fact that she could change him after these photos kills me

indeed, it’s very difficult to forgive betrayal and who the very wise man could do it!

Comment on the article "Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips"

Section: Treason (many husbands cheat on their wives after childbirth). Friends of these friends also have mistresses, yesterday I heard a conversation between a friend and husband, drank beer in the kitchen, a friend says: “I went on 06/19/2006 11:39:44, Wife after treason. Cheating on wife or husband: what to do next?

Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips. But it is important to remember that in adultery, as in any problem in family life with confession to friends and relatives, very often such confessions turn against you. The wife here admitted.

So it touched me .. Wife and husband. Family relationships. My wife complied with all the rules of a competent adultery, even at women's forums she consulted on how to make sure that my husband would not divorced My friend three months ago. I learned that my wife had an affair seven years ago.

The wife is hysterical, the husband is on the verge (he nursed his wife after an abortion, because she felt bad after anesthesia), but for the sake of two children and her beloved wife, she steps on her throat and more 10 tips. If the wife cheats: 4 types of women.

10 tips. The reasons for cheating: women love ears, men lack sex. Hello, tell me how can I overcome myself and not catch on the thought that my wife is not faithful to me? Today I found out that she corresponded and called up a colleague for six months, and ...

Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips. "Kylie Minogue kicked out the 29-year-old groom before the wedding for treason. Etc., as a rule, the wife is unaware (or pretending), and friends think incorrectly :)) Of these 60 percent of husbands, some may have wives .. .

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How to live if a wife cheats in a dream? How to believe this person? If she can do this in a dream, then maybe in real life? friend is not your friend. wife (I mean) - you are not a wife. you already decide, my friend. and generally Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips.

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Is it wiping your legs - not telling your spouse about your relationship on the side, knowing that otherwise a person will completely disappear, continue to live with him, just look at your wife. I found out that my wife is cheating on me. Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips.

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Cheating on a wife or husband: what to do next? 10 tips. treason. everyone writes how to survive the betrayal, how it relates to the husband (wife) after that. if they cheated on me, I would not live with this person. Perhaps I am wrong? why some suffer when they wipe their feet ...

Imagine that the wife's betrayal became known to her husband. I read here that many women forgive betrayal for various reasons: love for her husband, fear of losing her usual lifestyle and married status, for the sake of children, etc. etc. And they continue to live on.

I cheated on my husband ... ... and he found out everything. fiddling with ICQ (says that he was cleaning something, actually If the husband is smart, you won’t be on your knees. If you really love each other, Cheating on your wife. There is a situation that my wife is cheating on me. As I found out, I’ve just ...

Now you can justify a wife who has changed, saying, ah, a husband with a potency is not so, but with characters. I think that if a wife cheats, it’s very good. Therefore, she is already and the question is different, what do you need to change in yourself so that your wife’s desire disappears ...

I want to tell you how I cheated on my husband, why I did it and what eventually came out of this story. I have been married 5 years, have a child. I love my husband, he is an excellent father and husband. Before him, I had a relationship with two other men, but nothing happened with them for various reasons. But right now, his attitude somehow changed, some kind of aggression towards me is probably even angry.

We have a problem: he does not suit me in bed, but I really love this business and I want to deal with it. He knows that he does not suit me, he knows that I do not feel much pleasure with him. How to live with it further? No options help.

I often began to have dirty thoughts, I also have a fan with whom we communicate on the network (not even one, but two fans, just the second one is not such an active site and rarely writes). He knows about our problem, has long wanted me and offers help. But I'm afraid I can not decide on a betrayal of her husband. It seems that I will betray him (her husband) by this act, but, on the other hand, I want to understand if I can even experience orgasms.

Friends visited us that week, we have been friends for a long time. It so happened that everyone went to bed, we sat chatting with a friend and husband, my husband spoke poorly about me, scolded me. I don’t know how it turned out that our legs touched his friend, I was unpleasant about everything my husband said, for some reason I began to touch the friend’s foot more and more ... We sat, talked, secretly stroked each other's legs, and next my husband sat and did not notice anything. When he went to the toilet, his friend put my hand on his jeans - he was very ready. We were both shocked by what happened. I periodically went out to the toilet, then to the bathroom - to cool.

The husband went to bed. We sat, looked at each other's site and were shocked by all this. Then there was a kiss, then there was a petting. Both of us didn’t want to sleep, we wanted to continue, terrible interest and fear. At home, doing something when his wife and my husband are sleeping nearby is scary. Maybe I should go to bed, but I saw that he just didn’t want to sleep.

We went outside, found the porch - passion, kisses, I was shaking all over, the contact began - and he immediately finished. I had a terrible disappointment, he was in a hurry home so that no one would suspect anything, he was afraid that this might reveal itself, that I would speak to someone.

My soul was left with only sediment: for so long I could not decide on treason, and when it happened, it greatly disappointed me. On the one hand, there is a logical explanation: a terrible overexcitation and therefore everything happened so quickly for him for our first time. But now I can’t think of anything else - I want to finish what I started, and that's all. And at the same time having sex with two men is somehow unusual ...

They left, the next morning I behaved as if nothing had happened. There was no shame in front of her husband - he provoked me with his insulting words, uncomfortable in front of a girlfriend, a friend’s wife. But she herself talked so much about how passionate he is and how he constantly wants sex and he threatens her that he will have a mistress. He did not expect such fear, such indecision, that he, as a man, did not finish the matter with me, realizing that I was somehow unsatisfied (in theory, he should be ashamed, knowing that with her husband this is exactly what problem).

Outside was the end of summer. I then went to St. Petersburg with my parents for my aunt’s funeral. My husband and son stayed home. Immediately after the funeral, I went home, and my parents stayed there for several days.
  I almost missed the train. Just ran in the compartment and the train went. There were three people in my compartment — a woman with a man and a young guy. The guy was 20 years old, no more, and a woman and a man somewhere in their forties. As soon as I entered the compartment, the woman told me immediately:
  - Oh, and here is the fourth passenger. I propose to meet you. My name is Aunt Masha, and this is Uncle Vanya. This is Anton, she said, and pointed a finger at the young man.
  “My name is Inna, I'm glad to meet you,” I said in response.

Anton got up and helped me put my bag. I asked the men to go out for 5 minutes to change. She took off her skirt and blouse, put on shorts and a T-shirt. Climbed to the top shelf. She also took off her bra and, turning to the wall, fell asleep almost instantly. I really wanted to sleep. So I slept somewhere a couple of hours. When I woke up, I saw Anton on the next shelf. He was looking at me.
  “Get enough sleep,” he asked.
  - Yes there is a bit.
  “Would you like some tea?” Asked the question again.
  At that moment, I realized that I was a little hungry, and agreed to tea. Aunt Masha still told me to get down and have a bite. I did so.
  “Help yourself,” Aunt Masha told me, pointing to the pies — I baked them myself, they are delicious.
  Already Anton came in the compartment with four glasses of tea. The four of us sat down and had a tight snack. I climbed onto my shelf again and just looked out the window. Anton also climbed up. He will ask me something, tell me something. I was in a lousy mood, and I answered reluctantly. Gradually, I began to listen to him more closely and was already fully involved in the conversation. We chatted like this for about an hour. Then some confusion began below. I looked down - our neighbors were preparing to leave.
  “Here we are,” said Aunt Masha.
Saying goodbye to us, they left the compartment. Anton went to accompany them. I also stepped onto the platform. They left. Anton again turned to me and offered help.
  “Do you need to buy something?” Let me run away.
  “Yes, no, nothing is unnecessary ... though ... buy me a couple of bottles of dark beer.”
  He ran away. About ten minutes later he came in a compartment with a package. Anton took out four bottles of dark beer and dried fish. We sat eating fish, drinking beer, and talking. At the next stop, Anton once again went for a beer. Next, I already wanted wine, and he again escaped. Toward night, we were already pretty drunk.
  “How old are you, Anton?”
- 17.
  - It's strange, I thought you already have 20, look older I want to tell you. You have a girlfriend, I asked bluntly.
  - No, now I don’t. I was at school, but she left for another city to study.
  “Have you had this business?” I asked smilingly.
  Anton was terribly embarrassed and only shook his head negatively. There was a pause.
  So he is still a virgin, I thought. You like me - I asked a question. He became even more embarrassed, but still managed to squeeze out a positive answer and looked out the window.

After his words, I took off my shirt, exposing a chest of the second size. There was fear and surprise in his eyes. He continued to sit and look at my chest, not taking his eyes off. At the same second, a tubercle appeared in his groin area.
  - How long will you sit? Come to me, I said.
  He stood up and approached me. Anton did not know what to do, and just stood. I took one of his hands and put it on my chest. He carefully began to squeeze his chest. His actions were uncertain and timid.
  - Do not be afraid, boldly - I started it.

When I put my hand on his tubercle in my pants, he started with fear and surprise. I repeated to him that he was not afraid of anything. Lowering my pants, I released his cock. Of course, he was already completely ready. He felt a little more confident and began to work with his hands. He was very tensed when I grabbed the head of his cock with my hands.
  “Relax, all is well,” assured him.
  I again took his cock in the lips and continued to suck. Anton was still a little tense for a while. His hands were touching my body, but mostly rested on his chest. I began to swallow his cock more and more. Grasping his hips with my own hands, I began to move him. He fucked me in the mouth, going deeper each time. He quickly realized what I wanted and began to start moving forward and backward himself.
In such a rhythm he finished very quickly. There was a lot of sperm. She did not fit in my mouth, and I had to swallow. His cock was still standing, even though he had finished. I took a condom from my bag and gave it to him. While he was putting on a condom, I managed to take off my shorts with panties and turned my back on him and pressed my hands against the wall.
  - Well, what are you standing, come on already. He hesitantly ran a member along my labia and tried to get inside. He did not succeed, and I had to take the initiative in my own hands. I abruptly succumbed to him and myself landed on his cock.
  “Come on, move, don't stand,” I told him.
  After my words, he began to slowly move and gradually increased the pace. He quickly entered the rhythm and drove his trunk into me very quickly. My chest teleported with him to the beat. In less than two minutes, he stopped and his cock twitched. He has finished. We stood a little in this position. He continued to paw my chest. When he took out his penis, the condom was full of sperm.

I took a napkin out of my bag and handed it to him. He went to the toilet. While he was gone, I wiped my crotch with napkins and dressed up a bit. When he returned, I gave him money and told him to buy more wine and condoms. We had sex all night. With me he became a man.

I woke up in the morning from knocking on the door. Jumped up. I needed to get ready already. Anton all this time lay and looked at me. Before leaving, I leaned over and kissed him. I went to my husband, who was waiting for me on the platform.

It happens that wives cheat on their husbands. And then the deceived husband sits with his hands in his head, and thinks about what to do if his wife cheated. The situation, of course, is not pleasant and it is not known whether to immediately file for a divorce, or to wait a little longer and try to somehow rectify the situation. Indeed, the question is complex.

Of course, any decision should be made with a sober mind, so what should not be done in this situation is to get drunk with grief. Firstly, this still will not help, and secondly, in the morning, when you wake up, the situation will remain the same and the issue will still have to be resolved.

Of course, first of all, you have to talk with your wife. And this conversation will be difficult and unpleasant. You just need to figure out together what happened.

Very often, a woman changes when her feelings for her husband have already ended. Why this happened is a different question, but, as a rule, women, unlike men, cannot change only physically and they go on betrayal consciously. So, if your wife has tender feelings for her lover and is going to go to him, then you probably can’t do anything already.

She will leave anyway. Maybe then she will regret her act and want to return - this also happens. But it will be later. That is why you need to talk with your wife and find out what she is going to do.

If your wife does not feel any feelings for her lover, you need to try to understand why and how this happened. No, of course, we are not talking about physical details. It is about what exactly pushed your wife to treason. It is likely that she is already repenting of her act. And then you have to decide whether you want to continue your life together.

It is likely that during your conversation it turns out that some of the guilt for the fact that the wife has changed, lies with you. Perhaps you yourself, without noticing it, paid too much attention to other women, which offended your wife. Or perhaps you even cheated on her, and then her betrayal could be an act of revenge. Maybe you generally left your wife alone for too long for some reason.

In any case, the woman could not change just like that - the reason should definitely be.

And when you figure out the reason and understand the degree of your own guilt, then you will decide what to do. But if you are prone to unbridled jealousy and it will be difficult for you to forget her act, it is better, of course, to get a divorce, otherwise you just ruin the life of both her and yourself.

What to do if a wife has cheated on her husband

“The wife changes and does not hide it. How do I react? Ilya Polyakov. "

First of all, let's think: why is she doing this? Perhaps in such an original way she wants to provoke you to something that she cannot openly tell you.

Firstly, this may indicate your wife’s desire to part with you without being particularly active. The only thing the wife achieves in this case is an angry exclamation from her husband: “A traitor! Divorce!!!"

And then she proudly raises her head and arrogantly answers: “Well, good. Goodbye!" If a wife is cheating, this can also say, among other things, that she has someone to go to: the main thing is that the husband takes the initiative first. There are women who prefer to have the glory not of impudent libertines, but of abandoned exiles in order to morally justify in the eyes of society their departure "under the protection" of another man. In this case, think: maybe it’s easier to immediately offer to disperse to a woman who does not expect anything more from you?

Secondly, such behavior of a wife can be caused by ... excessive monotony of her existence. If she is a demonstrative woman, bright, constantly striving to be in sight, and you are inclined to a calm existence, to a daily routine that has not changed for years, to stable behavior in the family, the wife may well have the desire to diversify family life, and by any means.

One of such methods for a demonstrative woman may well be a scandal. With screams, tears, a showdown, beating dishes and recriminations. After such a scandal, the wife feels invigorated and relaxed in all respects, especially if followed by a sweet reconciliation, including in bed ... And it is not at all necessary that the wife really cheated on you.

Such a woman is worthless and lying, if only to literally enrage her husband. Indeed, in our society, many are convinced: most of all, a message about a wife's infidelity can infuriate her husband! Yes, even if from herself ...

Well, if you are a calm man and do not want scandals, then skip this by ear. By the way, very strong evidence that the spouse is most likely lying: your suspicion does not creep in even on an unconscious level. Then the wife repeats her “terrible confession” again, then again ... And so she will do until you scandal her. So think: is the wife’s desire for noisy conversations of your peace?

And thirdly, maybe all and vice versa, if you declare your own sexual freedom (and use it with all your might), without giving the same right to your wife. She, by the way, may not need this right at all, but she does not want to be “disadvantaged and deprived”. And he informs you: they say that you are not alone, hubby, are in demand, I also liked some people!

And again, this does not mean that the wife really cheated. In this case, think about what you mean by sexual freedom and whether to insist on a similar distribution of responsibilities further. After all, it may end up that your wife will ultimately really cheat on you ...

Well, which of the three options is more suitable for your actual relationship, you decide.

“My wife cheated on me with my boss. Is it just because he is more affluent than me? And how can I communicate with her now? Ivan Grekov. "

Responsible psychologist Elena Poryvaeva

Many people think that if a wife changed, she was really attracted by a higher social status and money. But after a single treason, it is very difficult for her to take advantage of all this! So, most likely, the reason was different.

Firstly, it may well be that the situation of betrayal has been brewing in your relationship for a long time and your spouse was psychologically ready for intimacy with another man (especially if she lacked something in family relationships, and not necessarily sex or money). And your boss just turned up, as they say.

In this situation, both of you need to figure out why the spouse has a need for another man? Why did your wife cheat on you? After all, if there was a betrayal - it does not matter on the part of the husband or wife - one way or another, both spouses are involved in its occurrence.

Secondly, maybe your wife acted with the best of intentions. Some women sincerely believe that, surrendering to the bosses of their husbands, contribute to the promotion of a spouse's career (especially if this spouse is the only breadwinner of the family).

Previously, for this purpose, bosses were given veiled bribes by deficits, but now what can be given when everything is on sale? So the wife decided to help you in this way. In this case, be generous and give her the right to make a mistake, especially since she, most likely, really tried for your sake and simply did not think that it would cause you trouble in the first place.

And thirdly, it may very well be that your boss simply forced your wife to intimacy by blackmailing her. Like, in the event of her husband’s refusal, tangible service troubles will appear ... Then your spouse just defended you.

And if such coercion really took place - she is not the accused, but the victim. Of course, this is a separate conversation - whether to undertake any legal formalities, but the woman certainly needs psychological support. And it’s especially important that this support comes from you - the person for whom she probably sacrificed her own beliefs.

“Until the age of 30, I did not create a family: everyone wanted to achieve some success in life before. When I was able to afford decent housing, furnishings, a car, a cottage, etc., I decided to get married. I met a slender, beautiful girl who became my wife. However, after a while I found out that my wife cheated with my friend. Blinded by jealousy, he immediately filed for divorce. And since I do not like all kinds of connections on the side, I got married a second time. In addition, I wanted to show my ex that the light did not converge on her like a wedge. He chose his second wife no worse: the same slender, beautiful. And recently I came home and found her with a man in bed ...

At first I decided that all the women were the same. And then he began to think: maybe something is wrong with me? Why does every wife cheat on me? And now I have a constant depression, I got to the point that I can’t work ... Yegor Sawan. "

Responsible psychologist Elena Poryvaeva

Women are not all the same. However, both of your spouses, oddly enough, were in many respects similar - not so much in appearance as in personality structure. Both bright, demonstrative women. I suspect that you chose such wives primarily because it is customary in your circle to have attractive companions.

However, in the first and second cases, the betrayal of your chosen one was to some extent predetermined. A woman of this type does not tolerate when everything in her life is measured and monotonous. She needs constant “change of scenery”, new impressions, new faces. You, as it turns out, are a fan of “life on schedule”, everything around you should go according to the usual order.

Both the first and second wife cheated on you because life began to seem fresh to her, and thus she added strong impressions to herself.

However, what about you now? Unfortunately, you can’t get along with your personality structure with a bright and demonstrative woman. Therefore, either get a wife who does not require more and more new impressions, or choose a new spouse according to the standards that your environment requires of you, but in this case, keep in mind the need to constantly “walk her”.

And you have to forget about your own jealousy, in other words, not to consider this spouse completely his property, so as not to fear the loss of power over her. By the way, even in this case, you are not immune to betrayal: the expressive lady will very soon have the same sexual partner, even if you show wonders of diversity in bed.

Remember that an adult cannot be remade. Do not hope that with affection or threats you will make your bright darling live according to your schedule. This will only lead to a loss of understanding, and then to the same betrayal.

And most importantly, understand: that your wife has changed, there is no your fault. And even the fact that two women in a row cheated on you does not mean that you are an inferior man. It’s just that you didn’t choose those who are able to appreciate you!