Are you afraid of independent women? When a man sees that his chosen one can calmly take responsibility for herself, manage her life and support herself, then for some reason he quickly retreats. By the way, there are many advantages in a relationship with an independent woman.

● She feels great alone

Some women panic and become helpless when they are left for several days, say, while going on a business trip. Independent women are great at handling things on their own, so you don't have to deal with countless calls and text messages from your partner who needs to ask you something right now or needs your help urgently.

● She knows what it's like to have your own life

An independent woman knows how to organize her own life. She has good job, which makes her financially independent. In addition, she has hobbies and friends with whom she enjoys spending time. When you are already in a relationship, she will not spend every day at home only with you because she has no other options to choose from. Routine? Never! An independent woman will not allow routine to creep into your relationship.

● She also wants you to have your own life

An independent woman does not require you to participate in your relationship around the clock; she does not want you to forget about your friends, your hobbies and established habits. She wants you to develop the way you want to develop. She is also ready to accept all your friends, not only other men, but also women. You won't feel like a caged bird in such a relationship. Your own needs and your friends are also important to your independent partner.

● She is a problem solver.

An independent woman takes your advice into account and can count on your support in a difficult situation, but she is usually able to solve everything herself. She is strong enough to withstand even the most difficult challenges. She doesn't want to burden you or put additional weight on your shoulders.

● She will be your equal partner

An independent woman knows what equality means in a relationship. She doesn't want to be higher or lower, worse or better. You can expect a fair distribution of responsibilities and harmony without unnecessary misunderstandings. This can prevent many conflicts and make your relationship more successful.

● She will not drag you to the registry office

And many men are afraid of this. They think that after a few months of dating, the partner will insist on marriage and children, even though the man may not be ready for such a serious step. If you are afraid of such “quick actions”, then an independent woman is your right choice. You will not feel pressure and will not hear constant complaints that she urgently wants a family and children.

● She has an excellent sense of humor

A sense of humor and the ability to tell funny and decent jokes are what define an independent woman. You don't have to be afraid that she will take jokes too seriously and be offended by your friends' dark humor, making you feel uncomfortable and embarrassed. Self-confidence and enthusiasm are the qualities that make her enjoy life.

● She doesn't hide her feelings

If you are dating an independent woman, you do not need to be afraid that you will not understand her notorious feminine logic. You don't need to transcribe her because she is always frank and honest. She has nothing to hide and doesn't feel the need to mislead you. If you hurt her, she will tell you so. If she doesn't like something about you, you will know about it immediately. Such communication can initially prevent many contradictions and disagreements.

● She knows how to behave around your parents and friends

You don't need to stay close to her all the time when you meet your friends or relatives. She knows what to say and how to respond tactfully. Even if your parents are absolute conservatives and skeptics, she will not be annoyed by this. An independent woman simply knows how to handle and communicate with a variety of people.

Don't wait - act!

Any, even the most insignificant movement forward is more effective than stupid waiting. They don't call after the interview? Call yourself and find out when a decision will be made. Boyfriend can't decide on plans for the weekend? Plan your leisure time independently of it. Can't get a promotion for a long time? Consider other companies or related vacancies. It is better to try many options and not get what you want than to do nothing at all. No one will do more for you than yourself.

Don't think about how they evaluate you. Evaluate it yourself

There is little pleasure in sitting on a date in a cafe and wondering, “How do I like him?” You've probably noticed that men often don't even consider the possibility that they might not like you. So relax, sit back and evaluate your boyfriend in all respects. At the same time, you will decide whether he is interesting to you or not.

Don't wishful thinking

Imagine how much time you can save if you don't waste it on interpreting signals of male sympathy. What difference does it make how he looked and whether he laid it? thumb for the belt of his trousers, if he still hasn’t called and offered to meet? An axiom tested by generations of women says: a man doesn’t call for two reasons: either he doesn’t want to, or he’s dead. The best attitude is calm optimism and the absence of mood swings due to someone's calls or lack thereof.

Know how to cheer yourself up

How to become successful and independent? Don’t let yourself become sore because your boss scolded you for being late, an elderly lady was rude in public transport, or your friend criticized you. new haircut. Other people should not negatively influence your emotional state and undermine your self-esteem. To stay in good shape, keep in mind a solid list of things that you enjoy: a warm bath with a book, a cup of coffee with syrup, going to the pool or going for a pedicure. Compensate for failure with pleasure.

Don't get over yourself

Self-love is the first step in any relationship in your life. Don't expect others to love you more than you love yourself. The most valuable relationship in a person's life is the relationship with himself. What matters is what you think about yourself. You can’t feel emotionally comfortable in the morning if the night before you sat in the office late doing someone else’s work. When you don’t want to do something, politely refuse, and you will feel what “a weight off your shoulders” and “lightness in your soul” means.

Don't compare yourself to others

Comparing your successes with the successes of others often leads to envy. How to become an independent girl? If you are unhappy that Lenka from the marketing department has received a promotion, but you, a procurement specialist, have not yet, think about what does not suit you in your situation. Do you not feel valued, are you working outside of your calling, or do you firmly believe that high status guarantees moral satisfaction? Comparing yourself with Lenka is the same as comparing south with north, and day with night.

Develop your abilities

Harmonious personal and professional development can make you happier and have a positive impact on your self-esteem. Regularly do what you are good at and what you really enjoy. Learn to do it really well. And sometimes it’s useful to trust some technique for identifying innate tendencies. You may not develop them, but you will certainly take note of them. What you don't do in your daily work can be turned into a hobby. Developing talent cultivates qualities that can be valuable in both your career and personal life.

Develop missing skills

You probably know the feeling of reluctance to take on a task that requires the use of tools that you do not know well. For example, you don’t like working in Excel and always procrastinate when preparing a report in this program. Ask a colleague to show you a few functions, and you'll finish reporting faster next month.

Here's what Brian Tracy, author of books on self-development and leadership, writes about the missing skills: “You can learn masterful time management just like you can learn anything, and here's a big clue: you may be missing just one time management skill to double your income. You may be missing just one business skill! You probably already know what this skill is...”

Forgive yourself for your weaknesses

Weaknesses are like curls in fingerprints; without them, it would be impossible to identify who the fingers belong to. Weaknesses make us not only imperfect, but also human, because they teach us to accept the weaknesses of others. Forgive yourself not laziness or bad habits, but some addictions and distinctive features: love of coffee, clutter on the table, slowness or excessive talkativeness. Although such little things take you away from the ideal, they work great for your corporate style.

Be financially independent

Material independence gives you an advantage in everything. Girls who are able to take care of themselves are respected more, and you yourself feel much more confident having a stable income. You can be a real master of your life only if you don’t ask for anything from anyone and don’t expect anything from anyone. An independent girl can afford expenses that some would consider unreasonable: spa treatments, shoes to lift her spirits, lunch at a restaurant, lots of swimsuits or taxi services. And also, in order to become an independent woman, it is advisable to increase your own emergency reserve, putting aside 5-10% of your salary every month. If the funds stop coming, you will not be lost.

Be free from prejudice

Some people initially accept for themselves the rules of life that the majority live by. In everything you need to listen to the advice of your parents, always give up your seat in transport, work only in your specialty, after two years of relationship you must get married, preferably before the age of 25, and there must be at least two children. Such attitudes are only suitable for you if you accept them for yourself. To curious neighbors eager to know when you will finally get married, it is better to answer politely but firmly: “As soon as I have such a desire, I will immediately inform you about it.”

Text: Marina Lysenko and Anzhelika Zakharina

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We usually associate strength with men, because a woman is supposed to be fragile and weak. But it just so happens that life becomes more and more difficult with every second, minute and day lived. And in order for a woman to survive today, she has to be not just beautiful, charming and feminine, but truly, spiritually strong, and in some cases, be able to stand up for herself physically. If a representative of the fair sex wants only her to manage her life and no one else, she needs to become a strong and independent woman. Only in this case, control over everything that happens in her life will always remain in her fragile hands.

How to become a strong and independent woman

There is strength in every person. It is she who makes us get up every morning, perform some tasks, strive to achieve goals, do what others ask, give up our desires for the sake of someone else’s interests, veiled under the word “should”. Probably the most hated word a person hears in his life is the word “must”. Of course, in some situations you cannot do without it, and sometimes a person, for various reasons, does not understand that it will be better this way. As children, our parents teach us to clean up after ourselves, wash our hands before eating or brush our teeth, citing the fact that this is the right thing to do. At school they force us to learn subjects, many of which we don’t like, again saying “we must.” But the trouble is that gradually, day by day, this word loses its power and becomes an irritating factor that causes protest and rejection in the depths of the soul, which is expressed among teenagers in the creation of their own subculture, incomprehensible to us. Any person feels discomfort when he hears the word “must”. Once you become an adult, it's time to get rid of it. If someone says this word, demanding to do something, always ask to explain why you should do exactly what he said.

Take courage and stop mindlessly doing what others say, no matter who they are. Let them take the trouble to finally explain why you should do what you don’t want. To become stronger, stop trying to please everyone. After all, you are not a lollipop to please others. Have an opinion on any issue. Learn to argue for it and before doing anything, think about what result you want to get and why.

The strength of a person lies in the fact that he cares about everything, whether it concerns deforestation in South America or the riots taking place on the streets of cities. Stop being indifferent. Take courage, open your eyes wide and see what is happening around you. There are many stray animals running around in your yard; make sure that they are sterilized, fed, and eventually find their owners. In the end, having completed such a complex and difficult task, write a letter to the city administration with a request to create a shelter for homeless animals.

Let someone say that you have nothing else to do, but having become stronger, you must remember that now someone else’s opinion cannot determine your actions and attitude towards the world around you. In response, you can say that thanks to your actions, there are fewer disadvantaged people in the world, and the children saw that they need to fight for their own beliefs, be kinder, more merciful and not hesitate to show a sense of compassion for others. And then ask what contribution this citizen made today, whom he helped, whom he protected, whom he taught a lesson. Moreover, if he does not like animals, then, apparently, he returns from orphanage, a boarding school for people with disabilities, or talked to difficult children at school or helped those who suffer from alcoholic parents. If this is so, then you can say that together you are making this world a better and kinder place for everyone who lives in it.

Stop turning a blind eye to the desire that reigns everywhere to get everything without effort and difficulty. And you will emerge from those who belong to this category. To know foreign language, you need to spend time finding the most effective teaching method, mastering it, and even try to visit a country where they speak the language you want to know well. Why should all other goals be achieved less difficult? Therefore, having realized that any desire requires effort, begin to act, and not wait for it to come true while you are lying on the couch. A certain amount of courage will be needed when you have to prove to your family that you are not wasting your time doing a hobby that in the future can become a good source of income. And in any case, every person has the right to personal hobbies and interests, so why would someone take upon themselves the right to deprive you of them. Learn to defend your interests, no matter what they relate to.

Photo: strong independent woman

Top 7 how to become a strong and independent woman

• When making a decision, always take responsibility for all consequences after its implementation. Don’t look for the guilty, don’t shift the blame onto those around you. Even if it really isn't your fault, think about what you need to do next time to avoid a similar outcome.
• Calculate your every step, prepare for the worst, immediately thinking about how you can correct the situation. Only those who are ready for anything always remain on top.
• When trying to prove that you are right, use arguments, but do not try to drive the person into a corner. The task of a strong person is to find a mutually beneficial solution, and not to destroy the enemy. This is especially true in family relationships.

• If the dispute is not related to some global problems and serious disagreements that can lead to intractable problems, have the courage to retreat, let your man feel on top.
• If the dispute threatens to develop into a quarrel, and for some reason the man believes that he has the right to raise his hand against you, then confidently and calmly tell him that this will be the last thing he can do in your life. life together. Learn to keep your word, do not forgive even a beloved man for insults addressed to you, much less assault. Think about the child's psyche when children see such a relationship between dad and mom. Take courage and admit the presence of violence in the family and, finally, for the sake of yourself and your children, leave a person who cannot even be called a man.
• Fight laziness, self-doubt, do not give up, because the most difficult struggle in a person’s life is the struggle with oneself. Only by overcoming all those traits that prevent you from becoming the person you want, you will be able to cultivate the strength of spirit and character. Don’t believe it when they write and say that character cannot be changed. Remember what seemed most important to you a few years ago, but today makes you smile. Likewise, today’s problems will one day become just a memory, but your task now is to learn a valuable lesson from overcoming them.

• Knowledge of the legal aspects of life in society will not hurt either. To become stronger, you need to have fundamental knowledge that will not only help in any situation, but also tell you where to find the answer to any question if a problem arises. To navigate what is happening around you, it is advisable to read the Constitution of your country, as well as familiarize yourself with what laws and codes regulate certain areas of relationships between people. Even something as simple as a loan can bring a lot of problems if you don’t understand how they should be issued and what rights you have. After all, today banks are trying to impose on each of us that only they are right in everything and only to the common man you will have to make excuses and defend yourself. Learn to stand up for yourself and your rights, stop thinking that this is an empty phrase, this is the only way you can become stronger. A person's strength can only be felt when it is recognized by others, and he himself feels that nothing can break him.

So that any person can live a long and happy life, he needs to learn to be strong. Strength of spirit will allow you to overcome any obstacles and cope with all difficulties. She will become the anchor that will keep you afloat, even in the most difficult situation. Strength of spirit and body will become real barriers to evil, pain and resentment, which, unfortunately, do not bypass the fair sex. And if you remember that in life a woman has to take care not only of herself, but also of her children, then confidence in herself, her strengths, mental and physical, will help her always remain on top, no matter what happens around her.

Oh these independent women! More than one man was trampled under the majestic heel! There are so many legends about their cruelty and deceit that Satan himself and the US State Department can envy. Relationships with them are a test that only a very strong and confident man can do. Others are afraid of them. And that's why.

1. Because she's not afraid to have her own opinion.

An independent woman, by and large, has independent thoughts. Among all the freedoms given to her, she has the most important - the freedom to think. Independence is possible only for women with a sharp mind, strong character and a certain amount of cunning.
She is stubborn, like a Mongolian tank, and will not rack her brains to find an alternative path. Especially if this path contradicts her worldview. She may be more stubborn than you. And more decisively. So don't piss her off.
She has the genes of a revolutionary, and she doesn’t care how you feel about her decisions.

2. Because she doesn't ask permission.

An independent lady doesn't need your approval. She has her own set of rules, which she herself wrote in her own ink.

She is one of those who, during her student days, without hesitation went into the dean’s office to argue and ask, while everyone else huddled in embarrassment in the corridor. She is one of those who tells annoying relatives that, to put it mildly, they have bothered their family with their annual unexpected visit.
Why are we so afraid of girls who adhere to their own set rules? Because they are not afraid of getting into trouble. More likely, she will have to get you out of trouble, and not vice versa. And it will also be unpleasant for you when every Friday she goes out “with her friends” just because she wants to, without at all asking what you think about it.

3. Because she's not afraid to bask in her own glory.

An independent woman does not hide behind a mask of “false modesty.” She is not going to fold her arms and pretend that she is not very proud of her leadership and success. This is not the pale sheep who lives for her husband. Career and success come first, and family comes second.
An independent woman is fierce and honest with herself. And if she is not proud of herself, there is something wrong.

4. Because you can't intimidate her

An independent woman cannot be intimidated by imaginary hierarchies. She knows that in any situation she can take care of herself, and all these threats of yours, all these pounding on the table with your fist and shouting a la “I told you!” have absolutely zero effect. She will not be intimidated by cheap tactics of intimidating the weak.
She sees everything as it is and understands which of you is weaker and who is really strong. Real power, even in the family, is based on respect, and not on beatings, fear and unpleasant scandals.

5. Because she doesn't really need you.

She doesn't depend on you and she doesn't need you. She doesn't need your money (she earns it herself, and she likes it), your approval and your instructions. She knows what she wants in life and takes what she needs.

On the other hand, if such a woman loves you, then this is perhaps the most honest relationship. She fell in love with you, and not your house and yacht.

6. Because she earns more

The economy greatly influences relationships. Sometimes it happens that a man is laid off at work, and the lady remains the only breadwinner in the family. And then something terrible happens. The man begins to be tormented by the thought that it is not he who provides for the family, which is fraught with depression, alcoholism and total insecurity. A man is not afraid of the fact that a lady is wealthier than him. He is angry that he earns less. And with nothing to do, he will sit at home looking for work, it will be difficult for him to come to terms with his role, protest is possible, because you should be cooler... But it turns out that she is cooler.

However, the worst thing is when she brags about her financial well-being. And it seems to you that with all her appearance she is trying to show that she does not need such a rag as you. She can achieve everything on her own.

7. Because she's hard to live with

You must truly love her and sincerely believe her. This can be very difficult, given her difficult nature. But in fact it is possible.
It's not made of stone either. Such ladies, oddly enough, have feelings. And even she needs to feel protected and loved. This seems surprising, but it is a fact. Do not torment her with your distrust, suspicion, indifference, otherwise she will leave you first.

8. Because her demands are too high

Sometimes such ladies make too high demands on men. Too tall. It is quite difficult to achieve their location, because the list of requirements for candidates is huge. And if you are a lazy ass, then an independent woman is definitely not for you.

There is a strange belief in Western society that a strong and independent woman is a phenomenon. I hasten to disagree with this, because strong women have always been, just now we have begun to realize this fact. In any case, strong women are those who do not rely on everyone, but build their own lives. They do everything to achieve their goal. However, this does not mean that they do not want to see the same strong companion next to them.

1. Strong women are always at work

Such women always think about their plans. They know what they want to achieve in their life and develop a clear plan on how to achieve it. Always keep your goal in front of your eyes. If you are dating such a woman, know that most likely you are already included in her plan.

2. Strong women get what they want

Once such women have developed a plan, they stop at nothing until they reach their goal. They don't settle for second place or something "more or less." They aim for the stars and will not be happy until they reach them. Again, if you are in a relationship with a strong woman, you better make sure you live up to her expectations, because she will not agree to anything less than “perfect”.

3. Strong women always take action.

Strong women never expect a kick from others. If she receives a job offer that she has long dreamed of, do not expect her to immediately discuss it with you. If something needs to be fixed in the house, then she will not wait until you get to the place to do it. But you shouldn’t feel less courageous because of this... how else could she, in your opinion, achieve her position in life?

4. Strong women are independent

Strong women don't need anyone in their life. They begin to act when they need it and are ready to do everything themselves. They do not look for someone to support them; in relationships, they give preference to those who grow with them. This does not mean that you should earn a lot, but at the same time not less than your woman. If you don't grow with her, she probably won't want you around.

5. Strong women are not afraid to be alone

Sometimes strong women want to be alone with themselves. After a hard day at work, she most likely will not want to quarrel with you or act like a caring housewife. She just needs a little time to recover after work and think things over. Remember: these types of women don't live for you, so don't expect her to be waiting for you at home with puppy dog ​​eyes.

6. U strong women strong friends

Friends of a strong and independent woman tend to have similar character traits. If you catch them talking, you're more likely to hear a debate about a business merger than a discussion of office gossip. It may look scary: a room full of girls talking about something you have no idea about, but you still have to admire their energy and determination.

7. Strong women are hungry for knowledge and constantly improve their skills.

Strong women always learn and improve themselves. They don’t waste time in front of the TV and don’t linger in trash bins. in social networks, while they can read or go to a master class. Be prepared to be proactive if you are dating such a woman. She is always open to new experiences, so you better be prepared for the fact that you will need to leave your comfort zone.

8. Strong women have “strong” beliefs.

Strong women are not at all morally bankrupt and they, of course, do not shy away from conversations about moral values. They will always stand by what they believe in. Be prepared to be at her side when she gets into an argument.

9. Strong women have a purpose.

Strong women have a global purpose to which all her goals are summed up. And, of course, all their tasks correspond to their value system. They feel incredibly important and believe that they can change the world for the better. Support her aspirations and help her achieve something more.

10. Strong women will only show you their weak side if they trust you.

Strong women are not immune to depression, and sometimes they feel lonely and insecure, despite their independence. However, they lower their defenses around those they trust, such as their family, good friends, and those they love. If your independent wife or girlfriend trusts you enough to open her soul to you, know that you are one of the most important people in her life. And when you understand this, the only thing you need to do is try not to lose her trust.

Original article: Lifehack

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